March 29, 2024
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Yearning to Have an Open Relationship With Hashem

There are lots of signs of summer. School and yeshiva end and camp begins. Tests and classrooms take a backseat to the relaxing outdoors. Weddings abound—my fridge door is covered with invitations! But there’s another side of summer also. The Three Weeks / Nine Days are on the horizon. With this period of time, we are reminded of a tremendous void in our lives left from the destruction of the Beis Hamikdash and our national loss for over two thousand years.

Our summer Torah portions begin with Parshas Shelach and Parshas Korach. I believe these parshiyos give us a deep insight into how we should view this seeming dichotomy of summer relaxation and loss and destruction.

Parshas Korach opens with the words “Vayikach Korach—and Korach took.” The Gemara says “vayikach” is the language of a mekach (purchase), indicating Korach made a bad purchase. He invested tremendous resources into his campaign against Moshe, ultimately leading to the earth swallowing Korach along with his family and all his possessions. Indeed, it was a really bad business deal for Korach.

The Torah uses a similar form of the word “kach” in describing a marriage effected by a man giving money to a woman to marry her: “Ki yikach ish ishah.” The same word is used when Avraham purchased Me’aras HaMachpela (Tomb of the Patriarchs) with money: “kach mimeni.”

The purchase of this double cave hints at uniting two souls predestined for each other forty days before being born. They live together in this world and will be eternally connected even after they pass away.

The word “kach” implies an eternal purchase, be it with Korach or with Me’aras HaMachpela. The Avos and Imahos buried there are eternally connected, while Korach being swallowed up by the ground indicates it’s forever—Korach will have no place in Olam Haba.

In Parshas Shelach, Calev went to daven in Chevron at Me’aras HaMachpela as a merit to be saved from the evil plot of the meraglim (spies). Why did Calev choose to daven there instead of the place of the future Beis Hamikdash where Avraham, Yitzchak and Yaakov had davened?

Calev davened precisely in Chevron, since he foresaw the future destruction. (The spies would give their report on the ninth of Av, the day the two Batei Mikdash were destroyed as a result of action on their report.) Kalev realized he needed a deeper connection to Hashem that would be impervious to destruction and loss. He thus went to Chevron.

Rav Moshe Wolfson explains that the root of the word Chevron is the same as those of “chibbur” (to connect) and “chaveir” (close friend). If we mix around the letters of chibbur/chaveir, they spells choreiv (destruction) and cherev (sword, which is a symbol of killing and destruction). This teaches us that if a chibbur is broken, the result is choreiv—destruction.

There are two cities that have a deep connection: Yerushalayim and Chevron. Yerushalayim housed the Beis Hamikdash and the presence of Hashem was palpable. The destruction of the Beis Hamikdash meant we lost the open presence of Hashem. However, our connection was not severed. Chevron is the city which represents a deep, concealed relationship. Chevron is where Adam and Chavah and the Avos and Imahos are buried. They laid the foundation for the Jewish nation, and their underground burial in a sturdy cave, concealed from the naked eye, signifies that the foundation for the Jewish nation still remains strong.

The Gemara says that whoever gladdens the heart of a bride and groom is like one who rebuilt the ruins of Yerushalayim. Every new married couple creates a Jewish home that brings Hashem’s presence back into the world.

In the summer wedding season, we have a great opportunity to repair the destruction of Yerushalayim. And when we transition to the period of the Three Weeks / Nine Days, we need to remember the message of Chevron—that Hashem still maintains a deep, concealed relationship with klal Yisroel, which we need to reveal.

The summertime has a relaxed tone, but it also reminds us of the physical destruction we have suffered. It’s time to introspect and to tap into the deep spiritual connections we have with Hashem, which are beneath the surface. May the day come speedily when we can once again have the open relationship with Hashem through services in the Beis Hamikdash.


Rabbi Baruch Bodenheim is the associate Rosh Yeshiva of Passaic Torah Institute (PTI)/Yeshiva Ner Boruch, where he leads a multi-level Gemara-learning program. Rabbi Bodenheim can be reached at [email protected].

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