Friday, September 18, 2020

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I fully agree with Rabbi Zahtz’s article concerning the deafening noise at simchas (“Dangerous Simchas,” October 31, 2019). I doubt that even the bat simcha can do much about it even if she threatens to withhold some money.

But I do wish Rabbi Zahtz would write another column about an equally serious problem at chatunot, one that is almost predictable, both here in Israel and in the US, namely the failure to recite sheva brachot until the wedding hall is almost empty. The dancing goes on and on, the guests gradually leave and finally a few people huddle around the head table to recite sheva brachot. Is this what a seudat mitzvah is supposed to be? Is this an example of “berov am hadras Melech”? The baal simcha may feel that he chases out his guests once the bentching is over. Let him say, when everyone is still present, “We will now bentch and say sheva brachot and then serve the dessert and continue dancing.” It behooves the mesader kiddushim rabbi to make the baal simcha aware of this problem.

Fred Gottlieb, M.D.