Remember the good old days when you had to use a phone book to look up somebody’s phone number? Or calling information…Do you remember dialing 411? Is there still a 411? I know that there is a 311… We usually end up dialing that the day of the Israeli Day Parade to find out about street parking. But 411, perhaps I will try dialing that and see what happens.

Or making a prank call? That would be the equivalent of today’s “cyber-bullying.” Calling someone and just hanging up. And then calling them again. Or, calling someone you like, they answer and then you hang up (sigh, his voice is dreamy). Of course if you do that one time too many, his father starts to answer the phone and then you could get into a bit of trouble.

Are you old enough to remember when it cost money to call people who were in a different county? My best friend lived in Kinnelon, NJ and every time I called her, it cost money. Or when you called New York City or, heaven forbid, Florida—it all took a toll on your long distance phone bill. It is a good thing we aren’t living in those times now because husband #1 would not be happy. Like when he runs out of Fanta and I have to pay full price for it—not a pretty picture.

Technology is what keeps our great country moving forward. It helps cure disease, it helps keep our hair from frizzing and it helps prevent a furrowed brow from turning into permanent wrinkles. But, it also takes away some of the mystery. Let’s discuss FaceTime, for example. FaceTime is a wonderful thing for those of us who have children in Israel for the year. It is a way for us to make sure they don’t have the chicken pox, that they have been doing their laundry, that they have been eating and that they haven’t gotten any piercings above the neck. It is also a way for us to continue to annoy them in the way that parents do best—throw them kisses, show them things around the house that they really don’t care about, let them see that their room has not been touched since they left… important things.

For those of you who are dating in this age of FaceTime, there is no more “blind date.” You can look them up on the internet and you can talk to them, face to face, without going out. Are you supposed to do your hair and makeup before you speak on the phone? No more lounging around in your pajamas, with your hair in curlers and cream on your face…you have to be “on” even on the phone. That doesn’t seem like fun at all, but it does save the guy money on taking you out if he doesn’t like what he sees. Man, husband #1 really missed out on that.

But the other day, I accidentally FaceTimed husband #1 at work. He answered the call, all excited, because he thought that I meant to FaceTime him and that, perhaps, I had something important to tell him. No, don’t even think what you are thinking. As I mentioned, I didn’t mean to FaceTime him, which means I had nothing important to tell him. Though, thinking about it, that would be a really cute way to tell your spouse that you are expecting, or that you are leaving him. Either way, keep it in mind.

We were talking about something and he said something that annoyed me, which really never happens, and I must have made a face, which also really never happens, and then he said, “Um, Banj, I can see you.” Oops. I totally forgot that he could see me. Now I know why I never FaceTime him…nobody needs to see all of that eye rolling. Which, of course, never really happens. Maybe we should go back to rotary phones and collect calls.

By Banji Latkin Ganchrow

 Banji Ganchrow is enjoying the technology of her iPhone, but always has a place in her heart for Grandma Flippy.