Kinda busy lately? Yup, me too. Preparing for four holidays clustered within the space of a month is not for the novice. It’s unavoidable. (Yet we were once all novices.) Wouldn’t it be great to follow around a seasoned homemaker from store to store and then be a fly-on-the-wall in her kitchen watching her prepare? In my fantasy version, I would request she narrate as she goes and throw in any hacks.

If we wandered through a Jewish book store this time of year, we would find several books meant to calm the nerves of Jewish women who want to learn the best ways of getting their homes into shape for the Yamin Tovim, and for Shabbos, without staying up all night. Having said that, it is pointless for me to recommend books for you to read now about making Yom Tov like a pro. That ship has sailed. I present you with a crash course of 13 suggestions meant to help you keep calm as you prepare for the upcoming chagim of 5785. I am fortunate to have some talented friends, and a clever husband, whom I admire for their ability to rise above the pressures of the holidays and prepare amazing meals. Each of them have shared their most effective tips. I invite you to look over the list and see which you might like to adopt. If by each candle lighting the atmosphere in your home is relaxed and you have that “ahhhh” feeling, then you may want to keep using at least some of these suggestions.

Award winning Realtor Juliet Krumholtz of Legendary Realty, LLC depends upon cooking ahead and freezing. The following is Juliet’s expert advice:

1. Freeze entire meals together so you never have to scramble to locate the main, the sides and the dessert.
2. Grab a label maker or sticky labels and label everything. Place the labels on the tops and the sides so they can be read from any angle.
3. Work clean. That means you should clean up between each recipe you prepare, so you are not overwhelmed with a sink overflowing with dishes and pots at the end.
4. Post copies of your menu somewhere in the kitchen. If you use a freezer outside of the kitchen, put it there as well.
5. Put up a white board on your freezer listing everything placed inside. When a package of food is removed from the freezer, erase it from the board.
6. My friend who is a nurse and an extremely talented cook and baker, stresses the importance of having all of her “recipe builders” prepared in advance.

“I make my broths, stocks, marinades, rubs, fried onions, cookie and pie doughs and pre-chop and freeze all the veggies needed way in advance,” she said

7. My friend the doctor and mom puts her vacuum sealer to good use and freezes what she has sealed.

“Keep your freezer well-stocked. I make mains and sides during the week and vacuum seal them. Everything is available to be whipped out for Yom Tov or for Shabbos,” she shared.

8. Create an extra shelf in your freezer by adding a rack to keep the packages organized.

Another one of my friends is a busy, hands-on bubby and has a delicious potato kugel recipe she likes to share. A frozen potato kugel can come out mushy, but she has a special technique that assures it will be firm.

9. Make your potato kugels ahead and freeze them raw. When it is time to bake them, remove the kugels from the freezer and immediately place them in a very hot oven.

From the beginning of our marriage, I have bragged that my husband is a better cook than I am. It is still true. Since he chooses many recipes that call for sauteed vegetables, he has expert advice on using his time management skills in the kitchen.

10. When you have multiple recipes that call for the same ingredients, make one large batch, such as sautéed onions, garlic or scallions and portion them out into pinch bowls to be added later.
11. To not stay up too late cooking, my husband establishes the time he wants to “call it a night.” Then he works backwards to calculate cooking and clean up time. This works when you stay true to your intentions.

I choose to share a tip that has nothing to do with food but is still essential to your holiday table.

12. I polish silver kiddush cups and other key silver items in advance of the Yamim Tovim. At the same time, I clean some of my favorite jewelry. I select a non-toxic silver polish that is meant to polish cutlery and other serving pieces. Polishes meant for cutlery contain a tarnish inhibitor. When tarnish inhibitors are applied to jewelry, they will shine for an extended amount of time.

Finally, the most meaningful tip came from a high school teacher and mom of a large family.

13. Over the years, in order not to get overwhelmed, she taught her family that it is “OK to be good and it is not necessary to be perfect. When we demand perfection from ourselves, it comes with a price.” That price takes a toll on the family including ruining the shalom bayis of the home. She advises placing the priority on our families and not on our menus.

“It is not about checking everything off of our lists.” If you need to make fewer side dishes for the sake of the family, do not be upset at yourself. Empower your children by assigning them the jobs to which they are best suited. The parent will observe how the child becomes engaged in performing their tasks, instead of being resentful for being asked to work. One Pesach one of her daughters was obsessed with baking. The girl prepared as many dessert recipes from all the cookbooks that she could. My friend did not try to stop her. Despite the kitchen being in an uproar, the girl had a sense of accomplishment and felt happy, and throughout the week, the family feasted on desserts.

This Yom Tov, I hope you design your menus and prepare your meals b’simcha. Feel free to clip this column and use it from year-to-year. Feel more relaxed yet?

Ellen Smith of iDeclutter, LLC of Central Jersey is a residential organizer and a member of NAPO, the National Association of Productivity and Organizing Professionals. For over 15 years, Ellen has helped people restore order and create calm in their homes and souls. See Ellen’s work on Instagram @ideclutterbyEllen. Contact Ellen for a complimentary phone consultation at [email protected]