Excerpting: “Infinite Love” by Rebbetzin Tziporah Heller Gottlieb. Artscroll. 266 pages. 2024. ISBN-10: 1422642623. Courtesy of Artscroll.

Love and Mitzvos

Love means seeking. The path of mitzvos is one that works for every Jew. You are an individual. Your means of seeking Him will reflect that individuality as you walk on the path He paved.

Love is connection. No loving connection can be one-sided. Hashem taught you how to love Him, and also how to experience His love for you. One of the secrets of loving and connecting to Hashem is — mitzvos.

Every mitzvah that He commanded is a statement of love. Every mitzvah that we perform is a way of creating a meaningful relationship with Hashem.

You may take mitzvos seriously. You may even move beyond the letter of the law by practicing what is called “lifnim mi’shuras ha’din — over and above the strict letter of the law.” You may, for instance, give tzedakah beyond the halachically required minimum. You may say Tehillim when you are in distress or hear the news and know you must do something beyond acting as though what you just heard didn’t touch you. You may be the kind of person for whom learning is the most essential part of your day.

YOU ARE SERVING HASHEM, AND YOU ARE DOING AN ADMIRABLE JOB. THE INSTRUCTIONS THAT HE GAVE YOU ARE MEANT TO CHANGE YOU, AND THEY DO.

What if It Doesn’t Work?

But what if you’re doing the mitzvos, and doing them well, but you’re not feeling transformed by them? What if you’re not getting the connection to Him that leads to love?

Here’s the bad news: Playing by the rules does not guarantee having a deep relationship with Hashem. The One Who gave you the instructions can remain distant from you because YOU HAVE NOT ONLY TO SERVE HIM, YOU HAVE TO SEEK HIM.

The story is told of a rebbe who, as a child in Russia, played Hide and Seek. The rules of the game differ from what we Americans play. In Russia, one player hides and the rest of the children have to try and find him. (Maybe the KGB agents started their careers by playing this version of Hide and Seek.) Our hero, the little boy, was “IT,” and he found a really good hiding place. He waited a good five minutes and was still safe. After ten minutes he was hot and bored. Worst of all, a disturbing thought entered his mind. He hesitantly emerged and was greeted by silence. The tears began to blur his vision as he ran home. When his father saw him, he asked his little boy what was wrong. “I’m hiding, but no one is looking for me.”

“That is just what the Shechinah feels,” was his father’s unforgettable answer.

But here is some good news: To some degree, every time you do a mitzvah something is happening to you. You say the words “King of the Universe” with every blessing. No one hears these words — except for you! Even if some of the time you are reciting them without a great deal of thought, the meaning seeps in somewhat. When you say King, you don’t mean an earthly ruler. You mean something beyond human vocabulary. You mean Hashem.

But let’s hope you want more. How do you go about actively seeking Hashem?

Beyond Words

As Ramchal points out in Daas Tevunos, Part I, Hashem is far beyond the limits words force upon you. For example, if I were to point to this book and say, “It’s a book,” I am telling you two things. One is that the object you are looking at isn’t anything other than a book. It’s not a chair, my neighbor, a bowl of soup, or any other one of innumerable possibilities. And two, whatever the word book has come to mean to you, the object you are looking at fits that description. But words don’t work when you describe Hashem. He is far beyond the myriad facets of history, physical components, and personal experience.

So how do you know — and learn to love — Hashem, if you don’t have the vocabulary to describe Him? You can describe the way He interacts with you. You can talk about the miracles of nature or your own private miracles that you see at times in your life. The more you let your heart open to what He does, the more you understand and “see” the ways He relates to His world and, more relevantly, to you.

Reprinted from ”Infinite Love” by Rebbetzin Tziporah Heller Gottlieb with permission from the copyright holder, ArtScroll Mesorah Publications.