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November 23, 2024
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Linking Northern and Central NJ, Bronx, Manhattan, Westchester and CT

Smachot in Difficult Times

Although the calendar still says Adar, simcha feels in very short supply. However, my lack of simcha pales in comparison to what I imagine are the feelings of families in our community who have had to cancel, delay or dramatically downsize planned smachot.

When our now adult firstborn son was born, he had a minor medical condition. By day five, the doctors had cleared him for his brit milah. We then learned that the Halachic imperative to safeguard human life and health was so strong, that the mohels apply a higher standard than even the doctors. The night before the brit, the mohel came and determined that our son was not yet fully recovered and the brit would need to be postponed.

At noon of the eighth day, the mohel came by and determined that our son had improved further and could have his brit. In the pre-cell phone age, we could only reach a handful of family and close friends. The brit occurred in our living room with about a dozen in attendance and we then had a modest seudat mitzvah in our dining room. We were thrilled that our son was healthy and, with 10 minutes to spare (thank you, Rabbi Katzenstein), that his brit had been on time (i.e. on the eighth day). However, Rabbi Neuberger, who officiated at the brit, could clearly see that we were deflated at being unable to share our simcha with many friends and family.

His words at our seudah were a source of great comfort to us. He highlighted that the first luchot (tablets) were presented with great fanfare. However, as we read in this week’s parsha Ki Tissa, they did not endure. The second luchot were presented in a quiet, understated fashion. Yet, these were the uchot that endured. That was his bracha to our son on that day.

To all the families dealing with the impact of COVID-19 on their smachot, that is our bracha to you. That despite the modesty of the celebration, the commitments that our life cycle events: brit milah, bar/bat mitzvah and weddings represent endure despite their delayed or scaled-down celebrations. Mazal tov and stay healthy!

Dror Futter
Teaneck
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