Teaneck—On Thursday, February 26, the Chevra Kadishas (burial societies) of Teaneck and Bergenfield gathered together for an evening of introspection, prayer and inspiration.
While most synagogues in town have their own Chevra Kadishas, on Zayin Adar the local Chevras of Teaneck/Bergenfield gather together for a special Mincha service—including the Torah reading that is read on any other public fast day—followed by words of Torah, then Maariv, and finally a seudah (meal) at which they break their fasts. Each year the event is held at a different synagogue. This year Congregation Bnai Yeshurun was the host synagogue.
Rabbi Steven Pruzansky, rabbi of Bnai Yeshurun, shared words of Torah between Mincha and Maariv and Rabbi Steven Weill, Senior Managing Director of the Orthodox Union, spoke to the assembled group during the seudah on the topic, “What Factors Produced the World’s Most Perfected Man?”
Zayin Adar is the day on the Jewish calendar set aside as a day of introspection and reflection for the members of the Chevra Kadisha. Many spend the day fasting as a kapara (atonement) for any disrespect they may have inadvertently shown a meis they cared for. As Rabbi Weill explained, “The reason Zayin Adar was chosen for this observance is that it’s the yahrtzeit (anniversary of the death) of Moshe Rabbeinu—the man that ultimately shaped our values. That’s why on this day, Chevra Kadishas around the world are gathering together.”
Micah Kaufman, a member of the Beth Aaron Chevra Kadisha finds this annual gathering very special. “I think it’s really meaningful that once a year the different Chevra Kadishas from across Teaneck/Bergenfield come together for this event of retrospection, learning and break-fast. The rest of the year we each tend to the needs of the meis and their families, but this one day, we can come together to acknowledge one another and engage in conversation.”
Generally these volunteers do not speak about what they do. Nor do they do it for any type of recognition. In fact, caring for a dead body is known as a chesed shel emet (ultimate kindness) since the person they are tending to cannot thank them.
Joseph Appel, Bnai Yeshurun Chevra Kadisha chair and organizer of this year’s event explained, “The Chevra Kadisha members are the first to interact with the family at this sensitive time. They’re there immediately to prepare the body (Tahara), set up the shiva house with shiva chairs, siddurim, a Torah and they also take care of the seudah the family partakes in after the funeral.” They take care of everything so that the family doesn’t have to worry about these details.
Martin Kasdan, General Manager of Gutterman and Musicant funeral home in Hackensack, attended the event. He told the JLNJ, “The Chevra Kadisha members do the work that needs to be taken care of that not everyone wants to do, and they do it so beautifully. This group of volunteers are so diverse in age and background yet they work together seamlessly.”
Amy Kotliar has participated in the Chevra Kadisha for many years, first in Passaic and now through the Young Israel of Teaneck. “I came to participate in the Chevra Kaddisha because I was aware that I didn’t have the same discomfort around death that others do and it was a way for me to give back,” she told the JLNJ. “I came to find that for me the Tahara strengthened my midot. For each step of the Tahara you must be so aware of how you’re using your Self in relation to the body; making sure that you are doing everything in the most respectful way possible that it has an impact on how you use your Self in the world in general.”
Most of the shuls in the community have their own Chevra Kadishas. In addition to preparing the body for burial, there are other ways to get involved. If you are interested, contact your local Chevra Kadisha or your shul rabbi.
By Sara Kosowsky Gross
