Sandwiched between the frenzied shopping days of Black Friday and Chanukah is Parshat Vayetze with a beautiful message for all of us consumers.
As Yaakov awakes from his dream and sets out on his life-altering journey he asks only for “bread to eat and clothes to wear”—just the bare necessities.
So, the question begs to be asked: How, amid the shopping for Chanukah presents, can we impart this important value to our children—to appreciate what we have and to understand the difference between what we want and what we need?
Let’s face it, as soon as Thanksgiving is over our kids begin angling for what they will be getting for Chanukah. As much as we like to emphasize the Maccabees, dreidels and latkes, for most children, it’s all about the presents! So how can we give them eight nights of gifts while still preserving an attitude of gratitude?
Here are some tips for reasonable gift giving that will satisfy the “gift-a-night” custom without creating the spoiled-child syndrome.
Games and Puzzles – Make Chanukah the time to go through your toy and game inventory: Retire games your kids have outgrown or that have too many missing pieces, and buy some new age- and skill-appropriate games that will facilitate great family-fun time and awesome “game-nights.”
Books – Help foster your child’s love of reading by giving him/her a book on a favorite topic. (After all, reading, more than any other academic activity, is directly correlated with higher achievement scores in high school.)
Clothes – Kids are always losing hats and gloves so now’s a great time to stock up on some fun and trendy pairs. Also, now is a perfect time to buy clothes that your child will be needing in the next few months anyway and that you know you will be buying at some point soon.
Replenish Art Supplies – If art supplies and other household staples are running low (construction paper, crayons, glitter, markers etc.), now is an opportune time to re-stock and wrap them up as a gift so kids will appreciate them.
Tzedaka – Giving a donation for one night can be a very meaningful family Chanukah experience. Discuss as a family where you can donate money and then chose a charity together with your children—something that resonates with them, and donate to that charity the money that would have gone towards one night’s present.
Spreading Light Through an Act of Kindness – Each night of Chanukah, we light an additional candle and in so doing we increase the light over darkness with each passing day of the holiday. Spreading light is a powerful message of the Chanukah story—and we can teach our children to increase their “light” as well by empowering them each day of Chanukah to do some act of kindness, thus underscoring the theme of the triumph of light over darkness. For example, make a drawing or project and bring it to a Senior Center to brighten up someone’s day, or give cookies or latkes to an elderly neighbor, or winter coats to homeless people.
Homemade gifts – Finally, let the kids get creative and use one night to exchange gifts with siblings, and to make a gift for parents as well. Poems, stories, drawings can be the best presents that will last a lifetime.
The above suggestions cover seven nights, which still leaves a night for that one special Chanukah gift of your child’s choosing!
Of course, we all have our own traditions when it comes to gift giving. I hope that some of these suggestions are helpful and speak to your family, and I want to wish the entire community a safe and joyful Chanukah!
Chanukah Sameach!
By Dr. Tani Foger, Principal, Yeshivat He’Atid
