It came in with a bang. In The Link office there was a discussion, as one of us had a nephew who was dorming at YU. He needed a place to go since the dorm was closing and asked his aunt if he could move into her house. A classmate was the son of one of the first known people in our area to become deathly ill with the coronavirus. His aunt immediately said yes, and others in the office said that if he stayed with her they would no longer come into the office.
Suddenly it began. New Rochelle was at the forefront and then the COVID explosion throughout the Jewish world—and the entire world was upon us.
None of us had a clue about what was going on. Many were isolated. In our personal case, my beloved Mordechai was so sick that he could not fathom what was going on around us. Finally when I took him out for a ride in the car and we drove on Route 4 he could not understand where the cars that usually filled the parking lots were. Everything was desolate. Let us not forget that this was only three short years ago.
Our grandson Eyal had his bar mitzvah with 11 men and five women in attendance in their backyard. Our grandson Ezra was married at Roemer with the maximum number of people allowed at the time, which was 100. The wedding was in New Jersey because at that time New York, which is where his kallah lived, only allowed 50 people maximum at a religious gathering. We danced with hula hoops, and in some of the pictures I honestly believe that with our masks we resembled the Taliban. There were a few sheva brachot (I remember one in the tent at Bnai Yeshrun), there was no aufruf, and dare I say that the young couple survived beautifully. Yes, it was sad that they could not have the same fanfare that is generally showered on these occasions, but their life has gone on beautifully.
I think that only recently did I use up the supply of toilet paper that my children made sure was stored in my garage (when I was totally shocked by the emptiness of the shelves in stores). It was actually the first time in my life that I had groceries delivered to my home. I certainly missed the interaction of going to the store and speaking to and meeting others. Have we forgotten standing in line to enter Trader Joe’s and Costco? It struck me as extremely comical the first time that I ventured out to Costco, waited in line with my mask in place and then finally was allowed into the store. People were afraid to stand too close to each other. Yet there I was, observing a man in the fruit and vegetable department with his proper gear in place, taking tomatoes out of each container until he found the most pristine one in each box, and putting them all together in his own treasury. So much for germs.
What, indeed, have we learned? I hope that those of us who ever truly believed that they were totally in control of their own lives realize that they are not. I hope that those who were at home during the summer months with their children because many camps did not function will take more time to be with their children when such a plague is not upon us. I hope that when there are government warnings about vaccines and the necessity of availing oneself of them that people have learned not to shirk off this doctrine as narishkeit.
What I am confused about is the return of outrageously large smachot once again. In many cases people are finding themselves in situations where they feel the need to keep up with the Schwartzes even if they are not in a financial position to do so. In that respect I do not see any change. The more lavish, the more grandiose, with no limit to the amount of spending. Guess what, everyone? There were those of us back in the day who went to the beauty parlor the night before our weddings to have our hair done, put on our own lipstick, and figured out how to put on our wedding gowns without someone helping us to get in and out of them. We had a three-piece band, and guess what? There was no singer. And everything was still perfect.
Nothing will ever be the same for the many families that lost loved ones. I am certain that every one of us knows at least one person who was greatly impacted by the loss of a family member. I wonder what they think about the quick turnaround that is occurring everywhere. My heart goes out to them and I think that it is imperative to be sensitive to the fact that not all of us are able to continue with life as it was in the past, because it never will be.
Nina Glick can be reached at [email protected].
