This past weekend, our family enjoyed a wonderful Shabbos at my parents’ home in the Forshay section of Monsey.
Shabbos morning was very cold, with a biting wind making it feel even colder. At about 7:20 a.m. I left my parents’ house to daven at the hashkama minyan nearby. When I arrived at Forshay Road, a busy thoroughfare, there were groups of chassidim with sons hurrying past me. As far as I could see there were groups of chassidim approaching from the same direction.
I had heard that the Gerrer Rebbe was in Forshay. His wife had needed surgery a few weeks back and afterward had to stay in New York for a few weeks for rehab. The rebbe had accompanied her and they were staying nearby. When I asked one of the chassidim if he was heading to the Gerrer Rebbe, and he answered that he was, without having much time to think about it, I joined him.
The fellow I walked with is a Gerrer chassid who lived in Staten Island. His parents live in central Monsey where he was staying for Shabbos, and he had walked a great distance in the cold to have the opportunity to daven with his rebbe. He explained to me that davening was from 8 a.m. until about 9:30 a.m. There was no kiddush or tisch, just davening. He also told me that at the minyan in the main Gerrer Shul in Yerushalayim there is a one-hour break in the middle of davening for learning, but as the davening was held in a large heated tent there was no break last week.
Ger is not known for externalities. They are known for punctilious adherence to halacha, but without fanfare. At exactly 7:59 a.m. the Rebbe emerged from the house and took his place at the shtender prepared for him, and the chazzan began davening.
After mussaf, there was a bris. The Rebbe sat down in the seat that was brought in a minute before, and the baby was immediately brought in. Within five minutes the bris was over, the final kaddish was recited, the Rebbe wished everyone a Good Shabbos, and by 9:45 he returned to the house.
It wasn’t easy standing on bleachers throughout the davening holding a siddur and Chumash, with a couple hundred people packed into a tent. But there are always things/people who are distinguished enough to us that we will endure some discomfort just to be in their presence. People wait outside all night before Black Friday for significant monetary bargains, others wait for hours after a game or will arrive extremely early before a game just to get an autograph from a professional player.
The people/things that excite us and for which we are willing to sacrifice for have a deep effect on us.
Our former neighbor, Yoni Halper, who recently made aliyah, presented at the Torah Umesorah Presidents Conference last winter. Yoni related that on Motzei Shabbos of the conference he saw Rav Shmuel Kamenetsky walking with his rebbetzin. He approached them and told him that a couple of decades earlier, when he was a young boy, he had met Rav Shmuel and asked him to autograph the “gadol card” he had of Rav Shmuel. Yoni told Rav Shmuel that it made a deep impression on him and he was very grateful when Rav Shmuel agreed to do it. Yoni reported that Rav Shmuel and his rebbetzin had a good laugh.
When Yoni told me that he still had the card, I told him I had to see it. It took him a few weeks to find it, but he did show it to me. It may be the only autographed copy of Reb Shmuel’s gadol card in the world.
Our society glamorizes celebrities, sports icons, and the rich and famous. There may not be anything wrong with trying to imitate the way a player excels, the way a singer sings, or the way an actor acts. But somehow it seems to go far beyond that. People who know how to play ball or are great actors don’t have any greater insight to life, politics or relationships. In fact, it’s often au contraire!
It’s important that we stress that our true role models in life are people who are selfless, loving and devote themselves to bettering themselves and others. Those are people worth emulating and watching how they conduct themselves, even if there’s no kiddush afterward.
By Rabbi Dani Staum
Rabbi Dani Staum LMSW is a rebbe and guidance counselor at Heichal HaTorah in Teaneck, NJ, principal at Mesivta Ohr Naftoli of New Windsor, and a division head at Camp Dora Golding. He can be reached at [email protected]. Looking for periodic powerful inspiration? Join Rabbi Staum’s new Whatsapp group, “Striving Higher,”: https://chat.whatsapp.com/E2YctWrACLo0yQeutVj9Tz.
