Recently I asked my students what Judaism is. Their varied responses all pointed to a similar conclusion: Judaism is having a target on my back, but it is also having someone/some being with me always. While people might try to attack us, we will always have Hashem and our family, the Jewish people, by my side.
In Parshat Lech Lecha, we see the opposite of this, or do we? Later on in the parsha, Avram seems to leave his family that he took with him when he left his father’s house. After returning from Egypt, Avram realizes that he and his nephew, Lot, would get into disagreements, so he advises to separate before that can happen. Avram tells Lot, if you go right, I will go left. If you go left, then I will go right. How can Avram split with his nephew knowing that Judaism is about having a family that will always have your back?
My students were not wrong. Avram is not saying that they are wrong. Family is vital and as the saying goes, every Jew is responsible for his fellow Jew, כָּל יִשְׂרָאֵל עֲרֵבִים זֶה בָּזֶה. Avram was teaching us something else: While it is important to be with your family and to always be there for them, you don’t need to be near each other to do it.
We all know people who may be a bad influence. We may want to stay away from them or want our children to keep a distance because we don’t want them to act a certain way. That person can be a family member, someone in the community or even a Jew that you encounter once in a while, but while keeping a distance is OK—and is even something that, at times, you should do—you must remember that you need to have their back. Despite parting ways, Lot is aware that Avram will still be there for him even though they don’t always agree on everything. This is evident when Lot is taken captive and Avram fights to save him. Hashem and Avram were both there for him. Hashem permitted Avram and his smaller army to triumph and save Lot.
We must remember that distance, differences in religiosity, politics or anything else do not mean that we don’t stand together and watch over other Jews. May we all unite as one Jewish people who feel cared for by every one of their fellow siblings and Hashem.
