We bet that many of you have met the lovely people mentioned above. The question is whether or not time was taken to acknowledge them.

Several weeks after our move from Montreal, we took our grandson Zev to Dunkin’ Donuts, one of his favorite places. Due to Zev’s “special needs” he has difficulty in making clear exactly what it is he would like to eat. We chose a donut with sprinkles and immediately Raj—a counterman at Dunkin’ Donuts, came over to us and said, “Forgive me, but I know that he would prefer a double chocolate.” We were so impressed that he took an interest in the clientele and knew what their preferences were.

As the months moved on, Raj became our Dunkin’ Donuts friend—he lives at home, goes to school, contributes to his family; a lovely young man who has probably served many of you in the past. Have you ever noticed him?

Shopping at the Gap in the Shops at Riverside is great fun, especially when their sales are on. We are still shocked at the number of coupons and discounts that seem to be afforded to everyone. (What does that say about the markup of clothing items?) There we were debating which of two sweaters we should purchase for our grandson. It was Glenna who immediately rescued us by informing us which one had a better sale price with a coupon. Upon realizing that we did not have a coupon with us, she immediately was able to produce one. Has anyone ever recognized her or thanked her for her service? We actually went on the Gap site to commend her, but unfortunately there is no place there to give the actual name of the person who served you—only your satisfaction with service.

By the way, we also went to the Dunkin’ Donuts website and sent a personal letter commending Raj. He told us that he was never informed that it had been received.

Our experience has been that the minute a service person is acknowledged for anything—commenting on his nice haircut; her lovely smile; his bright shirt; her beautiful eyes—their entire demeanor changes. What started out as being a boring, perhaps stressful day for them, suddenly boosts their morale and they are that more anxious to please. It takes an extra second, but the reward can be multiplied many times.

Our very dear friend Ellen Hexter, who was the closest to a sister that Nina has ever had, passed away several years ago in Rechovot. She told us the story that when she was in the transplant unit at Tel Hashomer there was a particular nurse who always seemed to have a frown on her face. Everyone in Ellen’s family had difficulty in communicating with her because she seemed so unpleasant. One day Ellen said that she decided to “do a Nina.” She complimented the woman on her hairdo. The next day there was a change in her demeanor. When Ellen’s children came to visit her in the hospital they were aghast that Ellen was carrying on a friendly conversation with this mean, unfriendly nurse. She and Ellen appeared to be enjoying each other’s company. Ellen explained that by doing “a Nina” she was able to totally change the way that this nurse interacted with her.

There are always challenges. At the corner of New Bridge Road and Westminster there is a crossing guard posted each week to help people cross the street to get to Beth Abraham on Shabbos morning. We have tried in every which way to get him to smile or speak. He is not able to respond appropriately. Nevertheless, we continue to wish him a good morning or a good day, with the hope that he has a slightly better day because he is being acknowledged.

Nina mentioned that when she is in a store and a salesperson is particularly helpful she shakes hands with them and thanks them for their effort and kindness. It honestly turns them into an entirely different person. None of us want to feel as though we are taken for granted and unappreciated. Try implanting several or even one of these suggestions into your daily life. It really takes no effort and the rewards abound.

About the Glicks – Rabbi Mordechai Glick enjoyed a long career in the rabbinate and academia – serving as the rabbi of a number of shuls in the Montreal area and teaching psychology full-time at Champlain College. Nina Glick led Yachad in Montreal for over 10 years and was closely involved in the Special Needs Community.  The Glicks have three children in the NYC area daughters and sons-in law  living in the Teaneck, Bergenfield area together with nine grandchildren.  They have participated frequently in the OU Marriage Retreat

By Mordechai and Nina Glick