Sometimes I am working so swiftly on my computer, that things get all locked up. I may have too many sites open along with Outlook, Excel and Word. The keyboard locking up or the screen freezing can be a recipe for disaster. Before I call my local help desk or worse, wait on hold for Dell’s help desk, I always try the stalwart “restart” button to see if everything clears up in the process of shutting down and re-booting.
In our lives, we also need a re-boot or reset button. Many times in my work I come across situations where clients are frustrated, angry, tired and about to give up. Their unfulfilled dreams of de-cluttering their homes are thwarted by their inability to make decisions or part with items that bring them no value or joy. And who takes the brunt of it? The organizer, of course, because we are there side by side sorting and listening.
Those of us in this noble profession understand that this is part of the process and that growth does not come without a bit of pain. Sometimes words are exchanged and feelings get hurt. But we understand it’s not personal and that we may be digging too close to a nerve. Before we know it the “reset button” needs to be pushed.
The experience I am about to share with you took place on my way home from a client. I was following my husband home from a job that we had worked on all day. We were in separate vehicles so that we could make several deliveries of clothing to a local charity. At the end of the day we were tired, hot (high temps, unbearably high humidity), hungry and eager to get home.
I was following Don as I watched him go under an overpass for Route 22 in Union. A car came off the ramp at lightning speed, and without looking the driver crossed over into Don’s lane. Fortunately, Don is an excellent defensive driver and saw him coming and slowed down to make way for this speed demon. Don honked his horn to let the other driver know that he was there.
The next thing I know, Don’s brake lights came on and he came to a complete stop on the very busy road. The speeding driver purposely drove in front of Don’s car, stopped his car and gave Don an obscene gesture, held it for several seconds and then drove off. It really makes you wonder what motivates someone to behave in this reckless and angry manner.
During my work day I do a lot of driving. I may be tired or distracted by my task list, calls to return and unfinished business with clients. On the way home I am mulling over the day and how I could have handled things better, differently, or perhaps pat myself on the back for a job well done. Sometimes I must push the reset the button so that I can walk up the stairs from my garage with a clear head and a smile on my face.
My trigger is my desire to be perfect at my job while balancing the emotional and physical requirements of the work. Sometimes a big hug at the end of a tough session is just what both participants need to reset. My private reset button in my car comes in the form of Sirius Radio’s Broadway, Classical or Siriusly Sinatra channels.
What is your trigger? Bills piling up and not enough cash in the bank account to pay them? A closet full of clothing and nothing that fits?
We all have our triggers, we just need to be aware when the reset button must be pushed before we hurt someone with words or actions. Your reset button can be as simple as taking a deep breath or petting the dog. As the summer season winds down and the holidays are upon us, let’s make sure we take the time for ourselves while remembering to treat others as they want to be treated.
Happy New Year!
By Eileen Bergman
Eileen Bergman is a professional organizer and a proud member of the National Association of Productivity and Organizing Professionals (NAPO) and the Institute for Challenging Disorganization (ICD). Eileen is listed in the resource directory for the Hoarding Disorder Resource and Training Group. She may be reached at 973-303-3236 or [email protected]. ©2018 Eileen Bergman
