When I was growing up in Monsey, I went into our garage one day and saw a mountain of empty soda cans and bottles. I asked my mother, “Where did this come from?” She replied, “There’s someone in town who’s never been to Eretz Yisrael and doesn’t have the money to purchase a plane ticket. He’s collecting cans and bottles to receive the 5-cent deposit to buy a plane ticket. I decided to help him! I’m collecting from all our neighbors and friends to give to this man.” With the help of my mother, at the end of one year, he had received enough money from recycling cans and bottles to purchase a plane ticket!
This week, on the 13th of Adar, Taanis Esther, is the yahrzeit of my mother, Miriam Mirel bas Shalom, a”h. It’s a good time to recall how she lived her life and thereby gain inspiration. My mother was a person who always looked for what others needed. When she went to an event or simcha, you could find her moving tables, helping set up or cleaning up—whatever was needed. It’s who she was.
We learn the concept of looking out for others in this week’s parsha, which contains a distinct anomaly: Moshe’s name is not there. Why? The Baal Haturim explains. After the sin of the golden calf, Hashem threatened to wipe out the Jewish people. Moshe’s response, based on his sincere love for the Jewish people, was emphatic: He told Hashem to erase his name from the Torah if Hashem destroyed the people. Hashem did spare the Jewish nation, but Moshe’s words had an effect. His name was erased from Parshas Tetzaveh.
Why from this parsha?
I believe the answer comes from the deep love of two brothers. Rav Chaim Shmulevitz points out many examples of the unique closeness that Moshe and Aharon shared. When Hashem chose Moshe, the younger brother, to be the leader, Aharon was tremendously excited for him! And when Hashem bypassed Moshe for the role of kohen gadol, choosing Aharon instead, Moshe wasn’t at all jealous. He inaugurated his brother Aharon with feelings of true jubilation!
In many ways, Aharon and Moshe were as one. I believe this is why Moshe’s name is omitted specifically in Parshas Tetzaveh. While Hashem did not want to omit Moshe’s name, He chose to leave it out of this parsha, where Moshe inaugurates his beloved brother Aharon as the kohen gadol. Hashem says, “And now, bring near to yourself your brother Aharon…to serve Me…” (28:1). “To yourself” indicates Hashem knew Moshe felt that everything that happens to Aharon is happening to him. Because of this true closeness, it’s like Moshe really is included in the parsha…through Aharon.
It says in Tehillim, “…to sit together like brothers.” If we felt that every Jew is our brother and sister, we would relate to them entirely differently. We would feel their pain and their joy as our own. Yes, brothers and sisters have their unique challenges, but Moshe and Aharon can be our role models here. The gain of one is not a loss for the other. Both experience their ups and downs…together.
Think about when you made a simcha and invited friends and family to join you. Didn’t you feel great when you got a sincere mazel tov call? Personally, I saved the voicemails from a few of my relatives with their mazel tov wishes. I enjoy replaying them to hear how their voices were filled with such true joy and happiness for us. It’s an easy gift to give someone else, and it means so much!
Purim is always preceded by Taanis Esther. The day is designated by Esther for all Jews to gather and daven for Hashem to save them. After this collective sign of great unity, we can then experience that salvation of Hashem that is Purim and all its great joys.
Purim itself is an amazing day. It’s hectic, it’s joyous—there is music, dancing, nosh, candy, costumes and laughter. It could be a day of self-indulgence, but it’s not. The entire focus of the day is on making other people happy!! The poor people get abundant gifts through matanos l’evyonim. Friends and neighbors feel noticed and cared for by the many mishloach manos they receive throughout the day. And everyone gathers together for a lively seudas Purim to finish off the day.
Let’s learn lessons from Aharon and Moshe, Queen Esther and others, including my mother, by focusing on the needs of other people and not ourselves. True happiness is in giving and seeing outside ourselves. It’s one of the many ways we can emulate our Creator.
Rabbi Baruch Bodenheim is the associate rosh yeshiva of Passaic Torah Institute (PTI)/Yeshiva Ner Boruch. PTI has attracted people from all over northern New Jersey, including Teaneck, Paramus, Fair Lawn, Livingston and West Orange. He initiated and leads a multi-level Gemara-learning program. He has spread out beyond PTI to begin a weekly beis medrash program with in-depth chavrusa learning in Livingston, Fort Lee and a monthly group in West Caldwell. Rabbi Bodenheim can be reached at [email protected]. For more info about PTI and its full offering of torah classes visit pti.shulcloud.com.