The COVID-19 pandemic has had many effects on the world and, in our case, has caused residual ailments to deal with as a result of the virus. Each week, as we have to refill our daily pail intake in our little weekly dispenser, we realize how time is going by and yet nothing seems to move. There is a certain sadness in this act which we never thought about prior to our COVID life. We moved on each day with activities and general life experiences.

We think that the greatest and most raw effect that the virus has had on our lives is that the virus is totally ageist. Suddenly, we and many others are being thrust into the world of “old people.” It is not at all funny but we often would comment to each other about how “tired” young people are. Frequently, when you ask a 20 year old how he is doing the answer is “tired.” Meet a young married couple without children who are either going to school or working and coming home to an apartment shared lovingly, and when asked how everything is going: “We are so tired.” We would look at each other and wonder what would happen if we were to fast forward to a few years later when children appear in the picture and more responsibilities arrive. What kind of tired will they be then? Yet they are young and vibrant and no one would consider them anything else.

Here we are, many years ahead of that stage in life. Yet a feeling of vibrancy has always remained with us. We are still inquisitive, still anxious to learn, to experience new things, to share in the excitement of what our grandchildren are doing. In many cases we wish to be included in their lives. Ask Eyal, our bar mitzvah bochur of this Shabbat (mazel tov), which grandparent loves to challenge him to ping pong and it definitely is his Bubbie. The first time we began a volley his eyes opened wide when he saw that his Bubbie could actually get the ball over the net. As the boys are shooting hoops in front of their house frequently Bubbie tries to hook a sinker. Agreed, Zaidie was never the athletic type. How many times have our entire families been together for a chag when after Havdalah we, the grandparents, would ask our kids where they would like to go and they would turn to us and ask if we were not tired. To drive to Rochester from Montreal to surprise a grandchild that was performing in a school play was never too much for Nina to do by herself. Age was never a factor in these choices. You are as young as you feel.

At some point we pray that this horror will be over. Young people will look back at it as a really weird short time in their life span. When the word is that a vaccine may not be medically and scientifically accepted for at least a year or two or five, we worry. Does that mean that we will have to live with all of these restrictions for who knows how long? As devastating as that is to the general public, for a senior one looks at life differently. We live today to our best ability. Our thirst for a productive life is still here. Although on the one hand we understand the necessity of separating the old from the young to keep them safe, we do not have as much time as everyone else to accomplish all that we wish to do in our lifetime. Please include us as much as possible. We do not wish to be segregated. Everyone wants to do the right thing, but for a newly arrived grandchild not to be touched by loving excited grandparents is painful. For a bar mitzvah boy not to have his grandparents attend his simcha is hurtful. To rely on others to do our shopping and see the many offers of chesed that have been extended to us is heartwarming and makes Nina especially teary eyed. Yet what we most look forward to is to have our independence back.

Not to have gone to shul for three months has taken a great toll on Mordechai. The camaraderie of the minyan and the fact that so many are kind to him whether or not he remembers their name is heartwarming. He needs that back. We need back in our lives the many routines that we had in the past. There is something very special about the feelings that each of us working at The Link has towards each other. We celebrated and mourned together when any of us had a happy or difficult moment in our lives. For Nina especially, who doesn’t have the extra “pleasure” of keeping up with life at home with little children and families, her pain is far greater than the others. She so needs those connections. No one can tell us that Zoom fills that need.

We want our lives back so badly and just because we are considered in the senior category of life we do not wish to be excommunicated from the world. Yes, we understand that it is supposedly for our benefit, but there comes a time when the loneliness and stillness of our lives supersedes all of the precautions.

By Rabbi Mordechai and Nina Glick