During the holiday of Pesach I was blessed with four generations living under one roof. We ate meals together, played Monopoly together, sang our favorite songs together and, for the most part, all slept under one roof. For eight days the jokes were funny and the conversations lively as the excitement of being together was infectious and the house was filled with laughter. Sure, for eight days you can wait a few minutes for the bathroom or share that last piece of cake you just snuck out of the fridge!
But buying a multigenerational home is not for eight days. For years my husband’s favorite television show was The Waltons, a heartwarming series which always ended with everyone saying “good night” to each other as the lights in each room dimmed with the music fading. Families choosing to join forces and purchase a homestead together is becoming more popular. These past few weeks I have shown three separate groups of buyers specific homes with this concept in mind. We looked at houses with separate entrances to the first floor, some with two sets of staircases which can create a sense of separate quarters.
In 2021 about 18% of the population in America lived in households which included working age adults and their children, plus aging parents. The advantages are obvious as more and more studies link longevity to social interaction. However, dividing the initial cost of the house through joint ownership, whether sharing the mortgage payments or, if a cash deal, each participant contributing their portion, allows the buying process to be much more affordable.
And then think about homework! Had my parents lived with me while the kids were growing up my father, a”h a legend in Tanach, would have studied all the Rashis and Rambans with them for their tests. My mom was a math whiz (I did not inherit that gene). I’m picturing her studying math and eventually algebra with them in the den, which I would have gladly traded for folding laundry or making dinner, though she was also a fabulous cook (I did not get that gene either!).
Am I painting an impossible picture? If you didn’t get along with your parents growing up, how could this possibly work out? As I have seen first hand these past few weeks, the dynamic in some families is perfect for this set-up both emotionally and financially. One family I showed a house to consisted of parents who had married children in the Teaneck area and were planning to have their 90 year old mother move into their new home with her aide.
For many, as nice as this may sound, it may prove impractical. Families may opt to live down the block from each other while others may prefer living in a different country. I’m looking forward to watching this trend. When it works out, it is heartwarming to see.
Nechama Polak is the broker of record and owner of V&N Group LLC, located at 1401 Palisade Avenue in Teaneck. Send your thoughts and comments to [email protected] or call 201 826 8809.
