We all procrastinate sometimes. The laundry piles up, the email sits unwritten, and that project you’ve been meaning to start? Somehow it’s still untouched. If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Procrastination is a common experience—and often a deeply frustrating one. So why do we do it, even when we know it makes us feel worse? And how can we break the cycle?
It’s Not About Laziness
Contrary to popular belief, procrastination usually isn’t about being lazy. In fact, most procrastinators care a lot—sometimes too much. Researchers have found that procrastination is often an emotional response to a task that feels uncomfortable, overwhelming or anxiety-inducing. When something triggers feelings of self-doubt, fear of failure, or even boredom, we avoid it in favor of short-term relief. That relief might come in the form of scrolling social media, cleaning the kitchen, or doing anything else that feels easier in the moment.
The brain craves comfort and certainty, and avoiding a task—especially one that feels emotionally charged—is one way to regulate discomfort. So what’s the problem? The longer we avoid it, the more overwhelming it feels.
The Procrastination Cycle
Procrastination is a perfect example of what’s known as “present bias”—a term used in psychology to describe how we prioritize immediate rewards over long-term benefits. Avoiding a hard task now feels good, even if it creates more stress later. It’s a short-term win with long-term consequences.
And here’s the kicker: The more we procrastinate, the more it can impact our self-esteem. We may start to believe we’re just “not disciplined enough,” which only adds more shame to the mix—and makes the cycle even harder to break.
How to Break the Cycle
Fortunately, procrastination isn’t a character flaw—it’s a habit, and habits can change. Here are a few strategies that can help:
- Break It Down
Large tasks feel overwhelming. Try breaking them into the tiniest possible steps. Instead of “Write the paper,” the first step on our to-do list might instead be to “Open a blank document” or “Write one sentence.”
- Use a Timer
The Pomodoro Technique involves setting a timer for 25 minutes of focused work followed by a short break. It helps bypass the “I don’t have the energy to do this” feeling by lowering the barrier to get started.
- Get Curious About the Emotion
When you notice yourself avoiding something, pause and ask: “What am I feeling right now?” Naming the emotion—whether it’s fear, guilt, perfectionism, or something else—can give you more control over it.
- Practice Self-Compassion
Beating yourself up for procrastinating usually backfires. Many studies show that self-compassion actually leads to less procrastination over time. Try saying, “This task feels tough right now, and that’s OK. I can still take one small step.”
- Visualize Success
Think about how you’ll feel after the task is done. Imagining the sense of relief or pride can increase motivation and make the task feel more worthwhile.
When to Seek Support
Sometimes, chronic procrastination is more than just a bad habit. It can be a sign of underlying issues like anxiety, ADHD, perfectionism or depression. If it’s significantly impacting your work, school, relationships or mental health, therapy can help. Learning how your brain works—and developing tools that are tailored to your needs—can make a world of a difference.
Just remember: You’re not lazy. You’re human. And with the right strategies, you can learn to work with your brain, not against it.
Ahuva Chefitz, LSW, LMSW, is a therapist at Collaborative Minds Psychotherapy LLC. Ahuva specializes in working with teens and adults navigating anxiety, OCD, phobias, dating and relationship challenges, and other life stressors. She utilizes evidence-based approaches including CBT, DBT, and Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP), creating a supportive space where clients can feel understood, empowered, and equipped with practical tools for lasting change. To schedule an appointment with Ahuva, visit www.collaborativeminds.net.
