Search
Close this search box.
October 30, 2024
Search
Close this search box.

Linking Northern and Central NJ, Bronx, Manhattan, Westchester and CT

The Great Sephardic Yichud Controversy

Many of the greatest Sephardic authorities of the prior generation, Rav Ovadia Yosef (Teshuvot Yechave Da’at 5:62), Rav Shalom Massas (Teshuvot Shemesh UMagein 1: EH: 4 and 3: EH 34), Rav Ezra Attia (Teshuvot Alei Ezra, Chiddushei Halacha section page 83), Rav Ovadia Hadayah (Teshuvot Yaskil Avdi (7 EH 10) and Rav Ben Tzion Abba Shaul (cited by Rav Yitzhak Yosef Techumin 31:255) all agree that Sephardim should continue to follow their age-old tradition to defer yichud until after the wedding. According to Sephardic tradition since the time of the Radbaz (Teshuvot 1:45 and number 931), a Sephardic chatan and kallah do not retire to the yichud room for a few minutes after the chuppah.

Arguments of Chacham Yitzhak Yosef

Chacham Yitzhak Yosef, the son of Chacham Ovadia and the current Sephardic chief rabbi, champions the traditional Sephardic approach in an essay printed in Techumin volume 31. Among his arguments is that the chatan and kallah locking themselves in the cheder yichud after the chuppah is unseemly (mechu’ar). Moreover, he argues that since yichud completes nisuin (the second portion of the marriage ceremony) according to the Rambam, Tur and Shulchan Aruch, a couple are married after yichud, requiring the kallah to cover her hair. Customarily, a kallah does not cover her hair during the wedding celebration.

However, Chacham Yitzhak has much to explain. The brachot for nisuin are recited at the chuppah. Delaying yichud for hours after the birchot hanisuin recited beneath the chuppah appears highly irregular. Chacham Yitzhak counters, though, that these brachot are ones of praise to Hashem for which the process need not be completed soon after their recital (unlike brachot recited over a mitzvah). Another questionable side of Chacham Yitzhak’s argument is that the brachot at the end of the wedding banquet/seudah seem out of place if yichud is not completed. Chacham Yitzhak counters that for this regard, Sephardim abide by the Rishonim who regard the chatan covering the kallah with his tallit[1] as the completion of nisuin.

Response of Rav Shlomo Levy

In response to Chacham Yitzhak article, Rav Shlomo Levy, the highly respected rosh kollel of Yeshivat Har Etzion[2] (and son-in-law of the eminent Rav Haim David HaLevi, the deceased Sephardic chief rabbi of Tel Aviv) penned a respectful rebuttal that appears in Techumin volume 32. Rav Levy defends what he presents as the current trend of Sephardic couples retiring to the yichud room after the chuppah. He notes the difficulties in Chacham Yitzhak’s arguments. Moreover, he offers a compelling reason to change the age-old Sephardic practice. Rav Levy notes that Ashkenazic practice does not accept such a large break between the brachot of nisuin and the completion of nisuin, as defended by Chacham Yitzhak. In the contemporary setting, Sephardic couples will most often wish to honor some Ashkenazic guests with the recital of one of the sheva brachot[3].

Ashkenazim, argues Rav Levy, would be unable to recite these brachot if yichud is delayed until the chatan and kallah go home after the wedding. This did not pose a problem in prior generations when Sephardim and Ashkenazim were hardly as integrated as they (baruch Hashem) are currently. A change in the practice regarding the timing of yichud enables Ashkenazim to recite sheva brachot at a Sephardic wedding.

In addition to Rav Levy’s point, we should note that Rav Mordechai Willig[4] cogently argues that the obligation for the kallah to cover her hair is only after the wedding is consummated. His logic is as follows: The halachot of hair covering are derived from the sotah (Ketubot 72a). The rules of sotah, in turn, apply only if husband and wife had previously consummated their marriage (Sotah 24b). Thus, the married woman’s obligation to cover her hair applies only after the marriage is consummated[5].

Conclusion:
A Suggested Compromise

Rav Yitzhak Yosef in the Tcehumin essay describes the passion with which his father, Rav Ovadia, felt about this issue. On the other hand, many kallot (especially Ashkenazic women) and their families very much want to conduct a yichud after the chuppah. This can sometimes lead to conflict when planning a wedding.

Rav Yosef Sharbat, the rav of the Sephardic Congregation of West Orange, New Jersey, suggests a compromise to resolve such conflicts. Conduct a “yichud” but in a manner not defined as yichud according to halacha. This involves leaving the door unlocked and not designating eidim to stand outside the yichud room. In fact, Rav Sharbat made this suggestion to the mesader kiddushin Rav Eliyahu Ben-Haim of Yeshiva University at his wedding. Rav Ben-Haim consented and this is what was done to the satisfaction of all involved[6].

[1] As is done at a Sephardic (and German Jewish) wedding.

[2] I vividly recall Rav Levy from my years of learning at Yeshivat Har Etzion in 1981-1983. Rav Levy made a deep impression on me and my friends as a profoundly spiritual talmid chacham who also was a Yeshivat Hesder hero of the Yom Kippur War.

[3] Rav Aryeh Lebowitz quotes Rav Hershel Schachter who goes as far to say that he would not recite one of the sheva brachot if a yichud were not to occur immediately
after the chuppah. See Rav Schachter’s B’Ikvei HaTzon 39:3, which supports this report. Indeed, Rav Schachter is fond of quoting the Maharil that m’ritizin et hechatan v’hakallah l’cheder hayichud miyad l’achar shevirat hakos, that the chatan and kallah should proceed expeditiously to the yichud room immediately after the breaking of the glass under the chuppah. Rav Schachter, though, notes that Rav Ovadia responds to this point in Teshuvot Yabia Omer 5 Even HaEzer 8.

[4] Rav Willig reports that this is the reported opinion of Rav Moshe Feinstein as well. Rav Aryeh Leibowitz reports that he heard this as well from Rav Aharon Felder, a longtime talmid of Rav Moshe. I heard it also from Rav Moshe Snow, who is also a longtime talmid of Rav Moshe. Chacham Ben Zion Abba Shaul (Hilchot Shidduchim and Chatunah, Amudei Sheish Ketubot 2a) and Rav Shlomo Zalman Auerbach (Shalmei Simcha page 343), however, disagree and rule that hair covering is required as soon after the kiddushin occurs.

[5] We should clarify, though, that Rav Willig insists that the kallah after the chuppah should cover her hair slightly with the bridal headband throughout the wedding, in keeping with the description in the Mishnah (Ketubot 2:1) of the bride with her headband (Hinuma B’Rosha).

[6] See, however, Rav Yitzhak Yosef (Teshuvot HaRishon L’Tzion 2:EH 9) and Rav Meir Mazuz (Mekor Ne’eman 2 page 183) who object to this compromise. On the other hand, Rav Mordechai Djavaheri reports (personal communication) that Rav Ovadia Yosef endorsed this compromise and even served as the extra person in the yichud room at his own granddaughter’s wedding!

By Rabbi Haim Jachter


Rabbi Haim Jachter is the spiritual leader of Congregation Shaarei Orah, the Sephardic Congregation of Teaneck. He also serves as a rebbe at Torah Academy of Bergen County and a dayan on the Beth Din of Elizabeth.

Leave a Comment

Most Popular Articles