I am largely basing this column on Bar Mitzvah: A History, by Michael Hilton (2014).

In Gen. Rabbah 63:10, there is the following passage: “Rabbi Elazar said, until 13 years a person needs to take care of their children—from this age onwards (“mi-kan va-eilech”) he needs to say: ‘Blessed is the one who has exempted me from the punishment of this one.’”

It appears that this R. Elazar is probably an Amora who lived in Israel and that one could look at this source and argue that the recital of our blessing has a long history and dates from the land of Israel in the Talmudic period.

But we have no evidence of anyone reciting this blessing in a public setting, or anywhere at all, until 11th century Germany. More importantly, we should not view R. Elazar as giving an instruction of halacha. Probably, all he meant was that this is the attitude that one should have in life from that point on.

In any event, according to early French sources, a blessing started to be recited in connection with the public Torah reading in 11th century Germany. There is a general principle that blessings that are not found in the Talmud should not be recited with God’s name and kingship (“Shem and Malchut”). Nevertheless, most of the early sources that I mentioned last week cited the blessing with both (Ha-Ittur, R. Yehiel, R. Avigdor, R. Shimshon, and Maharil).

But Leket Yosher (15th cent.), disciple of Terumat Ha-Deshen, cites his teacher as objecting to the recital of Shem and Malchut. His teacher recited “Berich Rachmana Malka de-ara She-petarani…”

R. Moses Isserles (16th cent.) first cites the blessing with Shem and Malchut but then concludes that it is“tov” to recite it without it.

Nevertheless, many subsequent authorities approved the recital with Shem and Malchut, including: the Vilna Gaon, Baal Ha-Tanya, Chayei Adam, and Kitzur Shulchan Aruch. The Complete ArtScroll Siddur, p. 444, gives a choice, putting Shem and Malchut in parenthesis.

A source from the 14th century refers to the recital of the blessing after the son has finished the reading. This is when it is recited today in most communities. But there are some siddurim which instruct the recital of the blessing as the son comes up to read.

Our blessing is not part of Sephardic tradition. But R. Ovadia Yosef has ruled that one should recite it, without Shem and Malchut. See Yabia Omer, OH 6:29.

An issue arises in the case of twins. Does the father recite the blessing twice, or should he change the text to “mei-onsham shel eileh” (from the punishment of these)? Another issue is reciting the blessing for daughters. Pri Megadim (18th cent.) raises the question, but concludes that the father’s obligation to a daughter to educate her in mitzvot is not such a substantial one (so few are involved), so no blessing is required.

————

Let us address the meaning of the blessing:

One view is that, since the father has an obligation to educate his son to follow God’s commandments, he is punished for negligence in this area until his son is 13.

Another view is that until age 13 the father was punished vicariously (or deserved to be punished vicariously) for the misdeeds of his child. The problem with this view is that there is a concept that children are not “bar onshin.” (But I don’t think we have to be so technical.)

A third approach is based on Ex. 20:5 and 34:7 (“poked avon avot al banim”) and some rabbinic sources that state that children are punished for the sins of their fathers. See, e.g., Sifrei Dev. 280: “ketanim meitim be-avon avotam” and Yalkut Shimoni, Rut, 600: “Until age 13, a son receives lashes for the sin of his father.” In this view, the meaning of the blessing is: I am no longer getting punished for those times that I caused my son to be punished for the sins that I did. (This last approach does not fit the context in Genesis Rabbah.)

————

Here are a few more insights from Hilton:

-In the 13th century there is a fragmentary reference to a “mishteh” for a son who is 13 year old. But the context is unknown. It may not be connected with the bar mitzvah ritual at all.

-Aside from the above, “there is not even a hint of evidence of a celebration meal for the bar mitzvah” from the 1280’s until the time of R. Shlomo Luria (d. 1574.) There are only isolated reports of the synagogue ceremony. These centuries were bleak ones for European Jewry. Also, it is possible that many may not have been recording the exact date of their child’s birth in these early times.

-There is relatively long passage by R. Luria in Poland mentioning the bar mitzvah ritual that he heard of in nearby Germany and that it involves a seudah. He also implies that there was sometimes a derashah. See Yam Shel Shelomo, Bava Kama, 7:37. R. Luria does not believe that the presumption of two שערות should be followed and complains that most of those who are just turning 13 do not meet this criteria and should not be reciting blessings such as Birkat Hamazon for others. But the Jewish communities continued to follow the presumption despite R. Luria’s objection, and this is what allowed the bar mitzvah ritual to spread. R. Moses Isserles adopts the presumption at OH 199:10. (How could one plan anything without this presumption!)

-After the passage in R. Luria, there is much documentation of the various practices at a bar mitzvah and it is all collected in Hilton’s book.

Magen Avraham (Germany 17th cent. OH 225:4) writes that a father is obligated to make a seudah on the occasion of his son’s bar mitzvah just like he has to make such a seudah on the day that his son gets married. Perhaps implied is that the seudah is to be of the same level.

There is an interesting passage at Soferim 18:7: “There was likewise a beautiful custom in Jerusalem to train their young sons and daughters to afflict themselves on a fast day. At the age of 11 to the middle of the day, at the age of 12 the full day, and at the age of 13 [the boy] was taken round and presented to every elder to bless him and strengthen him and pray for him that he be worthy to study the Torah and engage in good deeds.“

This work was composed a few centuries after the Talmud. But Encyclopaedia Judaica (4:244) surprisingly interprets this passage as describing a practice of “the period of the Second Temple.” Probably, they mean the late Second Temple period. But Hilton does not understand it as referring to such an early period and I agree.

Finally Isaiah 43:21 reads: “The people that I formed for myself, tehilati yesaperu.” The second word in this verse is זו, which has a gematria of 13. R. Shimon b. Tzemach Duran (d. 1444) writes that this verse is an allusion to the idea that a 13 year old will “tehilati yesaperu” (tell My praises). See his comm. on Avot 5:25. He cites this idea from a midrash. Some argue that there must have been some type of bar mitzvah derasha at the time that this midrash was composed. (Unfortunately, the midrash cited is not known.)

Mitchell First can be reached at [email protected]. His bar mitzvah parsha was “Ki Teze.” He recalls that his parents wrote a song to the tune of a famous song “Que Sera.”