The iconic story of the mother and her seven sons recounted in Gittin 57b is well-known and often repeated. It is most certainly etched in the minds of Jews of faith as a standard bearer for dedication and devotion to Hashem and His Torah. It is even incorporated in poetic form in the Tisha B’Av Kinnot recited by Sephardic Jews. The story, however, has a troubling ending, which we will try to explain in honor of this week’s observance of Yom HaShoah.
Gittin 57b
The William Davidson translation of the Talmud presents the story as follows:
The woman and her seven sons who died as martyrs for the sake of the sanctification of God’s name. The incident occurred as follows: They brought in the first of the woman’s sons before the emperor and said to him: Worship the idol. He said to them: I cannot do so, as it is written in the Torah: “I am the Lord your God” (Exodus 20:2). They immediately took him out and killed him.
And they then brought in another son before the emperor, and said to him: Worship the idol. He said to them: I cannot do so, as it is written in the Torah: “You shall have no other gods beside Me” (Exodus 20:3). And so they took him out and killed him. They then brought in yet another son before the emperor, and said to him: Worship the idol. He said to them: I cannot do so, as it is written in the Torah: “He who sacrifices to any god, save to the Lord only, shall be utterly destroyed” (Exodus 22:19). And so they took him out and killed him.
They then brought in another son, and said to him: Worship the idol. He said to them: I cannot do so, as it is written in the Torah: “You shall not bow down to any other god” (Exodus 34:14). And so they took him out and killed him. They then brought in yet another son, and said to him: Worship the idol. He said to them: I cannot do so, as it is written in the Torah: “Hear, O Israel, the Lord is our God, the Lord is One” (Deuteronomy 6:4). And so they took him out and killed him.
They then brought in another son, and said to him: Worship the idol. He said to them: I cannot do so, as it is written in the Torah: “Know therefore this today, and consider it in your heart, that the Lord, He is God in heaven above and upon the earth beneath; there is no other” (Deuteronomy 4:39). And so they took him out and killed him.
They then brought in yet another son, and said to him: Worship the idol. He said to them: I cannot do so, as it is written in the Torah: “You have avouched the Lord this day to be your God…and the Lord has avouched you this day to be a people for His own possession” (Deuteronomy 26:17-18). We already took an oath to the Holy One, Blessed be He, that we will not exchange Him for a different god, and He too has taken an oath to us that He will not exchange us for another nation.
It was the youngest brother who had said this, and the emperor pitied him. Seeking a way to spare the boy’s life, the emperor said to him: I will throw down my seal before you; bend over and pick it up, so that people will say that he has accepted the king’s authority [harmana]. The boy said to him: Woe [ḥaval] to you, Caesar, woe to you, Caesar. If you think that for the sake of your honor I should fulfill your command and do this, then for the sake of the honor of the Holy One, Blessed be He, all the more so should I fulfill His command.
As they were taking him out to be killed, his mother said to them: Give him to me so that I may give him a small kiss. She said to him: My son, go and say to your father Abraham, “You bound one son to the altar, but I bound seven altars.” She too in the end went up to the roof, fell, and died. A Divine Voice emerged and said: “A joyful mother of children” (Psalms 113:9), as she raised her children to be devoted in their service of God.
Greater than the Akeida
The courage and resolute devotion of each son is remarkable. It is critical that each brother invokes a different pasuk. The brothers are not mere “copy cats.” Each stamps his refusal with a personalized message expressing that he makes the decision independent of his older sibling(s). The firm response of even the youngest child is undoubtedly the climax of the story. His telling the Roman emperor that he pitied him captures the essence of the Jewish outlook. The supposedly all-powerful Roman emperor is not all powerful. He is, at the end of the day, temporal and temporary. Hashem and Torah are eternal and when there is a conflict between Torah and the Roman emperor, Hashem reigns supreme. This son refuses to countenance even a “gray area” of violation by merely bowing to the king’s ring. The mother is also correctly perceived as a powerful role model. She indeed surpasses Avraham Avinu in his dedication sevenfold. Her sacrifice and complete dedication are a foundational component of Jewish identity at least as much as Avraham Avinu and the Akeida.
Suicide!?
The mother’s apparent suicide, though, is deeply troubling. Halacha condemns suicide in the strongest of terms. The Rambam (Hilchot Rotzei’ach Ushemriat Nefesh 2:2) equates suicide with murder. He writes that one who commits suicide is a shofech damim, “spills blood.” In Hilchot Teshuva 3:6 the Rambam writes that a shofech damim is denied a share in Olam Haba. In Hilchot Avel 1:11, the Rambam writes that we do not mourn for one who has committed suicide. The grave of one who commits suicide is separated at least eight amot (12-14 feet) from other Jews (Gilyon Maharsha Yoreh De’ah 345:4). Accordingly, how do we, despite her severe distress, comprehend a genuine Jewish heroine committing suicide?
Explanation #1
In delving into this story with my sons Binyamin and Hillel, we raised the possibility that the mother fell from the roof by mistake. She did not actively try to kill herself. I thought that the word the Gemara uses in connection with the mother’s death, “venaflah” (and she fell), as opposed to “hipilah atzmah” (she threw herself down), supports this interpretation. However, my son Binyamin notes that the Gemara (Bava Batra 3b) records the story of the woman who killed herself to avoid marriage to King Herod and describes her fall as “venaflah.” Thus even the word “venaflah” can refer to an intentional suicide. Moreover, the Rambam (Hilchot Avel 1:11) and Shulchan Aruch (Yoreh Deah 345:2) rule that we presume suicide in a case of one who was in deep distress and ascended a roof and fell. Thus, the idea that the mother simply fell off the roof is not conclusive.
Explanation #2
Another suggestion is that a malach pushed the mother off the roof. Hashem recognizes that the mother longs to be reunited with her sons in Olam Haba and Hashem facilitates the realization of this deep desire. This might be the reason the bat kol (heavenly voice) broadcasts a ringing endorsement of the mother, proclaiming “Eim habanim smeichah,” the mother of the sons is very pleased (applying the words of Tehillim 113:9). The bat kol informs us that the mother did not commit suicide but is pleased with Hashem reuniting her with her seven devout sons. While creative, this approach is somewhat speculative.
Explanation #3
The most straightforward explanation seems that it was a deliberate suicide emerging from her profound grief. Perhaps it is for this reason the mother asks her youngest to tell Avraham Avinu that she endured seven Akeidot. She is asking Avraham Avinu, who understands the emotional toil taken by the Akeida, to defend her suicide on the grounds of her unparalleled grief. This explanation is untenable. I grew up with neighbors who were Holocaust survivors who endured even worse suffering than the mother, yet went on to rebuild their lives and create new families. Rav Ephraim Oshry, the rav of the Kovno Ghetto, reports (in his Teshuvot MiMa’amakim) with pride how suicide was startlingly extremely rare among observant Jews despite the unimaginable torture endured. It is unfathomable that the mother, a paradigm of righteousness, would destroy herself out of grief. Such behavior is a flagrant violation of Torah law.
Explanation #4
The most convincing explanation lies in the juxtaposition of the story of the mother and her seven sons to the story of the 400 children who committed suicide to avoid being coerced into a life of terrible sin. Tosafot (s.v. Kafetzu and Avoda Zara 18a s.v. V’Al) cite Rabbeinu Tam who explains that the children’s suicide is condoned since they feared being coerced by torture into a sin requiring martyrdom. In such a case Rabbeinu Tam argues that it is a mitzvah to sacrifice one’s life. Sadly, this was not a matter of mere theoretical interest for Rabbeinu Tam. He lived in the throes of the worst onslaughts of the Crusades. Jews of France and Germany actually sacrificed their lives in order to avoid being coerced by torture to convert to Christianity. Accordingly, my sons and I believe that the mother was concerned that the evil Romans would find a sadistic manner to coerce her to worship idols in revenge for her sons standing up to the Roman emperor. She sacrificed herself in order to spare her soul of the contamination of idolatry.
Conclusion
The bat kol may be understood not only as condoning the mother’s actions but also as a report on the mother’s happy disposition in Olam Haba. She stands proud, the bat kol reports, not only of her sons but also of all of her spiritual sons and daughters, especially during the Shoah, who remain steadfast in their faith and actions and remain completely loyal to Hashem and Torah no matter what challenges are thrown their way. She is proud of all those who follow the example set by her sons and herself and recognize the joy of choosing eternity over the temporal.
Rabbi Haim Jachter is the spiritual leader of Congregation Shaarei Orah, the Sephardic Congregation of Teaneck. He also serves as a rebbe at Torah Academy of Bergen County and a dayan on the Beth Din of Elizabeth.
