“Death and life are in the power of the tongue” (Mishlei 18:21). When I first encountered this verse in Proverbs, I read it as poetic hyperbole, a rhetorical flourish meant to promote the gravity of the book’s medium: communication through words. However, as we prepared SAR High School for this year’s theme of Koach HaDibbur, the power of words and speech, I came to understand that perhaps this verse is meant to be taken quite literally. I had been concerned that a year-long arc of informal educational programming on the proverbial “power of speech” might seem trivial in a high school setting. Don’t students learn in nursery school that the words we use matter? But Koach HaDibbur is not only highly relevant to our students’ and our own lives in the current polarized political and social climate, but it has become increasingly clear that we all need help navigating the sheer variety and volume of words we consume on a daily basis. As a Jewish collective, we have seen how words can bring people together, giving strength and even life, and also how words can spread hatred, encourage violence and destroy lives.
The first step towards a responsible use of our words requires reflection on our own experiences in light of Jewish values. This year at SAR, we will ask students and teachers to consider times when words impacted them positively. Can you think of a time when words enhanced your sense of self, boosted your self-esteem, or gave you the confidence to be creative and move beyond your comfort zone? Conversely, we will ask them to consider when words hurt them. Has someone ever said something that made you feel isolated or alone, insecure or uncertain of your worth? Sitting with the emotions that the words of others have evoked demands the courage to make ourselves vulnerable. It is a difficult exercise but also a valuable one, especially if we want to train ourselves to be more mindful of how the words we use affect others.
Judaism demands this mindfulness. Beyond the proverb, God chose speech as the medium by which He created the world: “And God said, ‘Let there be…’” Words can create entire worlds. Revelation at Sinai, the greatest theophany in history, was conveyed through language; the Torah itself is a portable collection of God’s words. It is through words that the community of Israel was created and its relationship with God eternally forged. Finally, we celebrate our redemption, both past and future, and instill a collective identity by retelling our story again and again, “vehigadita l’bincha.” There are more than 30 commandments in the Torah related to speech. All of these parts of Judaism demand that we understand the gravity of words.
Next, we need to embrace our Jewish values as a counter-cultural stopgap against the abuse of the power of speech in our public discourse. We live in a world saturated by social media posts, manipulative rhetoric, and debate tactics that feed from and foment vitriol, outrage and disgust. All forms of media seem to elevate “dingers” and ad hominem attacks. The basic design of social media rewards people for expressing anger and hatefulness, as these messages are the most frequently shared, liked and reposted. One must consider the impact of this cycle on young people being raised in a world where words are often used to cause harm, to dismiss, and to diminish—and where speaking this way can garner popularity or at least attention.
In a world of misinformation and cruelty, the Jewish community must advocate for genuine communication. As Rabbi Lord Jonathan Sacks, zt”l said, “This is why friends, parents, partners and leaders must establish a culture in which honest, open, respectful communication takes place, and that involves not just speaking but also listening. Without it, tragedy is waiting in the wings.” Judaism demands that we find alternatives to mainstream behaviors, prioritizing civil discourse; listening deeply; asking questions with curiosity, humility and a generous spirit. We—educators, parents, writers, community leaders and fellow Jews—must model what this kind of speaking, writing and engagement can look like, offering an alternative to what our children, and we, hear on a daily basis.
If we are truly willing to dig deep, we will also discover that language shapes how we experience and perceive the world. In “Metaphors We Live By,” linguists and philosophers George Lakoff and Mark Johnson reflect on the central role metaphors play in constructing social and political reality. They argue, for example, that viewing conversation as a battle you can win or lose “shapes how you argue—you attack your opponent’s positions, defend your own, and gain or lose ground.”
Interestingly, they also note that we often use terms typically associated with money to talk about time, treating both as commodities: “That flat tire cost me an hour…You need to budget your time…Is that worth your while?… He’s living on borrowed time.” What is the impact of this way of speaking? The metaphor suggests that time is considered “useful” or “worthwhile” only if it is spent acquiring something material or achieving something practical.
Perhaps there is an alternative way to speak about time that can also shape how we understand our use of words. When the Torah describes how we conceive of time, it uses words like “remember,” “guard,” “keep,” “consecrate,” and “sanctify.” The implication of these words, R. Abraham Joshua Heschel writes in “The Sabbath,” is that “there is a realm of time where the goal is not to have but to be, not to own but to give, not to control but to share, not to subdue but to be in accord.” We need to utilize our vocabulary, the rich lexicon Judaism offers, to shape the world in which we live.
As Rosh Hashanah approaches, it is appropriate to reflect on how much of our vidduy (penitential prayer) focuses on the misuse of words. Harmful and hateful speech—even when no one directly affected is present—harms the speaker and shapes our perception of the world. As a school, we will focus on the halakhot related to lashon hara, cursing, lying and other forms of negative speech. However, during the High Holiday season, when we vocalize our mistakes, regrets, hopes, dreams and commitment to self-improvement, we will also reflect on our positive values and who we want to become as a community. We will emphasize civil discourse, storytelling, prayer, verbal commitments, and, of course, Torah learning. The words we choose shape our souls. Positive words can create a beautiful world, fostering an outlook that allows us to be open and kind, even in the face of passionate disagreements. We are committed to an education inspired by the Jewish emphasis on the power of speech.
Ms. Shuli Taubes is the chair of the Machshevet Yisrael department and teaches Tanakh, Comparative Religion, Jewish Identity and Health at SAR High School. Shuli received her Master of Divinity (MDiv) from Harvard Divinity School and her BA in history from Barnard College.
About Machon Siach: Machon Siach was established in 2015 with a legacy gift from Marcel Lindenbaum z”l, honoring the memory of his wife, Belda Kaufman Lindenbaum z”l”.
