July 23, 2024
Close this search box.
Close this search box.
July 23, 2024
Close this search box.

Linking Northern and Central NJ, Bronx, Manhattan, Westchester and CT

Are you dreaming of owning your own home? Amid all the buzz about low housing inventory, people are still buying homes. The beginning path to homeownership begins with finding the right property and securing a mortgage.


Qualification and Rates

There is “in the box” vs. “out of the box.” If you meet standard qualifications, you’re “in the box.” This typically entitles you to market rates.

If your circumstances are less conventional, you’re “out of the box.” While rates may be slightly higher, this approach can still help you achieve your homeownership goals.

Ah, the dream of owning your own home — the white picket fence, the cozy fireplace and the unmistakable scent of fresh paint mingling with a hint of buyer’s remorse. Let’s cut through the real estate fog and get down to brass tacks. Buckle up, aspiring homeowner, because the journey is like riding a roller coaster blindfolded — exciting, and occasionally involving the unexpected.


Crunching Numbers

Downpayment? Check. Mortgage payments? Check. Real estate taxes? Check. Homeowners insurance? Check. You’re crunching numbers faster than a squirrel hoarding acorns before winter. But wait, there’s more! Brace yourself for the unexpected expenses that pop up like surprise guests at a housewarming party:

Electric and Gas: Your utility bills play hide-and-seek. One month, they’re whispering sweet nothings; the next they’re staging a full-blown opera.

Tree Maintenance: Trees are like needy houseplants. They demand attention, pruning and occasionally a stern talking-to. (“Listen, oak tree, I don’t need your leaves clogging my gutters!”)

Roof Maintenance: Roofs are like moody teenagers — fine most of the time, but when they decide to leak, it’s a dramatic flood of emotions (and water).

Landscaping: Your lawn wants a spa day. It craves fertilizers, sprinklers, and maybe a soothing massage. (Note: Lawn massages are not covered by insurance.)

Sump Pump, Boiler and Central Air: These are the unsung heroes of homeownership. They work silently until they don’t. Suddenly, your sump pump is doing the backstroke, your boiler is throwing a tantrum and your central air is on strike.

Appliances: Your refrigerator and microwave are plotting against you. They wait until you’re hosting a dinner party to stage a rebellion. (“Sorry, folks, the fridge is boycotting ice production tonight.”)

Deck Maintenance and Swing Set Drama: Your deck needs staining, and your swing set is harboring secrets. (“Why does the swing whisper ‘Carpe Diem’ every time I push my kid?”)

Tree Grooming: Because nothing says “adulting” like arguing with a tree trimmer about optimal branch angles.

Floods: When it rains, it pours. And sometimes, it pours right into your basement. (Cue the dramatic music.)


Budget Like a Pro

Remember, budgeting isn’t just about buying house numbers, it’s about the unexpected. Set aside an emergency fund for these surprise expenses. And when the unexpected strikes, channel your inner superhero: “Fear not, citizens! Captain Homeowner is here to fix the leak, battle the squirrels and negotiate with the microwave.”

So, my fellow adventurers, embrace the chaos. Homeownership isn’t just about four walls and a roof; it’s about creating memories, learning to unclog drains and mastering the art of “I swear I’ll fix that next weekend.” Now go forth, armed with your budget spreadsheet and a plunger, and conquer that unpredictable castle you call home!

Carl E. Guzman CPA, NMLS# 65291, is the founder and president of Greenback Capital Mortgage Corp. and www.mortgagegenius.com. He is a real estate mortgage banker and business financing expert with over 35 years’ experience. He currently has 214 five-star reviews on Zillow. Carl and his team will help you get the best mortgage financing for your situation and his advice will save you thousands! www.greenbackcapital.com; [email protected].


Leave a Comment

Most Popular Articles