In this week’s parsha, Vayigash, when Yaakov is with Yosef he says אָמ֣וּתָה הַפָּ֑עַם, this time I will die. What does it mean when Yaakov tells Yosef that this time he will die? Did he think there was another time earlier that he thought he was going to die?

I believe that Yaakov realized that his being a closed off father and husband were not good. He realized that he wasted all those years when he thought Yosef was dead; He could have accomplished things, yet he threw them away. When we just sit, do nothing and only feel sorry for ourselves, that is like dying. Yaakov must have realized that it was as if he was dead, maybe not physically but emotionally and spiritually.

Yaakov is now telling Yosef, now that I have seen you—now that I have my spirit back and see that my legacy will go on—I can physically die now. How many times do we waste opportunities and only realize it when it is too late? Learn from Yaakov and realize that we shouldn’t close ourselves off, we should live. We don’t want to realize one day how much we wasted and lost.

By Shira Sedek