1. Stress is normal and healthy in this situation. Let’s embrace our moodiness, irritability, anxiety, anger, sadness, fear and frustration. Understanding that they are all a normal part of our experience now will allow us to have them and model for our children that these are normal and healthy aspects of the experience.

2. Self-Care. We all need ways to self-care during this time. Find something you can do to feel sane, whether it’s exercise, meditation, watching TV, taking a bath, talking to friends/family, or having a glass of wine. We all need to identify what our coping mechanisms are and utilize them as much as possible.

3) Routinize. Have some sort of routine that makes you feel the semblance of “normalcy.” Whether it is adhering to some sort of schedule or routine, for example, making sure to get dressed even if you aren’t going out, or creating a schedule for the day, giving you and your family some structure will be of vital importance.

4) Laugh every day. Research shows laughter is the best medicine, so find some outlet to laugh. There are a bunch of funny comedians, TV shows, memes about corona, or even a family tickle war—even if it feels forced, do it. It will help you feel a release of some tension.

5) Socialize. We are living in a time of technological advancement that enables us to communicate with people across the world. Let’s use our technology to connect, and with connecting, not be afraid to let others into our emotional world and express the full range of feelings we are having to support each other. Let’s also encourage our children to have virtual playdates even for a few minutes, so we can all be reassured our friends are doing well too and stay connected despite our physical distance.

6) Limit screens. Checking the news constantly is not psychologically healthy for us. What excites the media is drama, and anxiety feeds a news addiction. Setting a limit of what is realistic for ourselves (for some it could be 30 minutes, others longer), during which time we put our phones on silent, will be fundamental for mental health.

7) Get some fresh air. Even if we are limited to our backyards, we have been blessed in New Jersey with some nice weather. Being in the familiar sunshine that makes us happy is great. Sit outside with a cup of tea and encourage your kids to enjoy some fresh air and run around your backyard to get some vitamin D and smiles.

8) Move. We will have to find creative ways to move our bodies and stay healthy. Dance parties, family games of dodge ball or capture the flag, or a family yoga class are ways to keep some movement going. As we know, exercise is highly correlated with stress reduction and mental and physical health.

9) Plan for the future. Make plans for after the quarantine is lifted. Right now there is a lot of uncertainty regarding how long this will last, but at some point we will experience freedom of movement and travel again. Start talking about trips you plan on taking, with your kids, plans for upcoming birthdays or vacations (maybe long-term…) so we can maintain hope for the future.

10) Don’t panic! We are resilient. We are strong. Crises bring out the best in all of us. Through this experience we will grow and change. Let’s all find ways to support ourselves and each other through this difficult time.

Shuli Sandler is a clinical psychologist practicing in Teaneck, and is a candidate at the New York Psychoanalytic Institute. She can be reached via her web site at https://www.shulisandlerpsyd.com/.