Orthodox and traditionally Jewish parents and adult relatives of lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender (LGBT) children will gather to build a community of support, learning, and inclusion for their families in Jewish life at the Capital Retreat Center in Waynesboro, PA in March. Participants from Orthodox communities nation-wide will meet to explore the issues and concerns of having an LGBT identified child in Orthodox communities. It is organized by Eshel and is supported, in part, by an anonymous donor. It is their second annual retreat. Eshel founder Miryam Kabakov organized the first conference after several parents of LGBT youths said they were lonely and unable to discuss what it meant to have an LGBT child with their friends or rabbis.
One of the retreat organizers who is also the parent of a gay child said: “… When a child ‘comes out of the closet’ it is a common experience for the parents to go ‘into the closet.’ In many cases, it takes a while for a parent to accept this new reality in their life.” The seminars and meeting will include strategies for inclusion of their children in Orthodox life. The retreat is designed to be helpful for all parents, whether they are struggling or accepting of their children’s LGBT identity.
One of the organizers is so committed to this work because many Orthodox children are at the risk of suicide. “It is the lack of understanding and acceptance within some Orthodox circles which can lead someone to feel that they would rather take their own life than to come out to their families.”
Since the retreat is right before Purim, themes of the holiday will be incorporated into some of the discussions. The theme of being hidden in Megillat Esther, which is read on Purim, is resonant of the experience of having an LGBT child in Orthodox community because people who are LGBT and their families sometimes choose to remain hidden. In Orthodox communities, the issues are sometimes hidden so well that people aren’t even aware that there are LGBT within their own congregations.
Participants at the weekend will be asked to honor people’s need for confidentiality both at the weekend and afterwards. Everyone will be asked to sign a confidentiality agreement. Every participant is expected to keep confidential personal details and identifying information of the other retreat participants.
The gathering will take place from March 7-9th at the Capital Retreat Center – 12750 Buchanan Trail East, Waynesboro, PA 17268 (717) 794-2177. The Center is a first-class, full-service hospitality campus near BWI and Philadelphia airports, and a one-hour drive from Baltimore, MD and Washington, DC. Dining is under strict Star-K Kashrut supervision, with Glatt Kosher meats and Cholov Yisroel dairy products. www.capitalretreat.org
For more information and a list of community partners go to the Eshel website: http://www.eshelonline.org
