I know that sentence could be part of a movie where every guy is referred to as dude and each one would be comfortable at the frat house getting drunk on beer. By the way, as you may know, I am married. I also know that adultery makes God’s top-10 list of commandments. However, I still want to know who did I sleep with last night?
My boys are not babies. 7 and 9 they are. They are generally happy, energetic, wild, and crazy. Yup! Normal that is. BR, my 9-year-old can sleep through a storm. Really. He woke up refreshed the night we were huddled in the basement as Hurricane Sandy bore down on our area. However, putting him to sleep is another story. It can be a process. Well, at least we get to have some bonding time.
SJ actually tells us he is ready to go bed. How beautiful is that?
By 10:00 p.m., my house is essentially a kid-free zone. My wife and I are free to do adult things. Did you know it’s possible to have a conversation in your home without interruption or Spongebob talking in the background? Yes, it’s the down time that everyone—especially crazed parents—need at the end of the day. Except for some business trips, my wife and I have started every night together in the same bedroom.
Yet, there was a recent two-week period where that changed. Morning came. The alarm rang. I turned and my wife was gone. Dun, dun, dun. Where has she gone?
Before I can say Perry Mason, I am not alone in bed. No, it’s nothing like that. Come on now people, where are your minds? You really need to watch less cable.
Anyway, there’s a bulge in the covers at the base of the bed. Or there’s a head leaning on my elbow. Or my blanket is in a jumble. Who is behind all this nocturnal activity? You know. Cause you’ve been there. Right? Of course. The boys have snuck into our bedrooms more often the last couple of weeks than Romeo went to meet Juliet. Seriously, I think we should have a sign-in book at the door to trace the activities.
Regarding these nocturnal visits, there are two huge differences between my wife and me. First as you noted, I am still waking up in my bed. A wrecking ball would have to smash through our bedroom window before I’m giving up my bed. The second thing you may have noted is that I don’t discover we have guests until the next morning. My wife, who falls asleep faster than Usain Bolt runs the 100 meters, wakes up nearly as easily. “Did a feather just fall?”
Yes, the boys have woken me up a few times over the last couple of weeks and many more over the years. However, I don’t get up. And yes, I did stink during those years when babies have to be fed during the middle of the night. I’ll take the mid-day feeding thank you very much.
Anyway, I was glad when this phase passed and the boys were back spending the entire night in their bed. It’s best for them, my wife and me.
Oh yeah, to answer the burning question. My wife gets up and goes to sleep in one of the boy’s bedrooms. Ain’t that a shame that she has to get up in the middle of the night. Come to think of it, with a bed of her own, she might be the smartest one of the bunch.
Larry Bernstein is a free-lance writer, teacher, and tutor. He and his family live in Bergen County. You can find his website at larrydbernstein.com His blog address is memyselfandkids.com
By Larry Bernstein
