Upon hearing the news that a chartered bus had rolled over and crashed on Saturday evening not far from the Brandeis campus I was startled into remembering my experience attending my first Torah Leadership Seminar at the Lake House Hotel in Woodridge, NY. Groups of “older” staff members (college students) were crying and in total shock as they dedicated the first evening program of the event to the late Yolanda Benson, z”l. Yolanda had been a participant at the seminar as an advisor until the unfortunate tragedy that took her life. She was a passenger on a bus returning students to college after seeing the play “J.B.” In the case of that accident, nine students were killed. Ironically, J.B., the story of Job and the trials of his life and how he dealt with them, was what the drama department of their school decided to see on Broadway.
It was the story of the life of Yolanda that was the most unbelievable. She was born during the years towards the end of the atrocities in Europe, and her parents begged a Catholic family to take her in as their own and provide a normal life for her. For many years, I believe until she was 6 or 7, Yolanda grew up with this family and attended a Catholic school. It was the only life that she knew until her parents miraculously survived and came to retrieve her after many years.
Reluctantly she was reunited with her parents, who eventually were able to come to the United States and settle in Freehold, New Jersey. Yolanda was their only child and over many years began to change her lifestyle into that of a Torah-observing Jewess. In one second her precious life was whisked away and her parents mourned the loss of losing their daughter for the second time. This time it was a permanent loss.
It was natural for me to return to this memory as soon as I heard of the Brandeis tragedy and I thought about all of the festivities that are taking place this week with regard to Thanksgiving.
I wonder how many of us really take advantage of the day in the way in which it is supposed to be observed. There is lots of football, plenty of decisions as to what type of stuffing to make, important worries about which Black Friday deals are worth it or not, and families spend time discussing their plans for Chanukah.
How many will be taking the time to write short notes to those they love telling them how special they are? How many will take the time to mentally forgive those who have, probably without intent, hurt their feelings? How many appreciate the food on their table and have signed up to volunteer at a local food bank or Thanksgiving dinner for the homeless? We are all too busy.
Do not take anyone for granted because, as the parents of Yolanda can tell you, it is possible to speak with someone at 10 a.m. and then get a call at 11 p.m. to find out that person is no longer alive.
We should not have to be reminded to give thanks by a fatal bus accident. Take the moment while you can as often as you can. That is what the news of the Brandeis crash reminded me.
