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December 13, 2024
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Linking Northern and Central NJ, Bronx, Manhattan, Westchester and CT

Mordechai Schmutter

Mordechai Schmutter is a freelance writer and a humor columnist for Hamodia and other magazines. He has also published seven books and does stand-up comedy. You can contact him at [email protected].

Articles by Mordechai Schmutter

Guess How Much I Paid?

I love how when you buy something for a good price, you’re so proud of it that you start showing off to people who are

See ‘Em Never

There is no day in school more exciting for kids than days when there’s a class party. Everyone gives out candy and you sing songs

There Are No Shortcuts

Welcome back to “What weirdo technology did Mordechai buy this week?”—the column where we talk about something I bought and ask ourselves why, and in

No Body Nose

From time to time, I write articles about expressions that people find annoying. And some time ago, I wrote an article that commented on how

Cooped in With the Chickens

When people ask me, “Mordechai, is there a good pet I can get that will actually give me something in return, but not nearly as

Lucky Ducks

I think the biggest issue with the Nobel Prizes is that it’s all for things that nobody understands. For example, this year, the Physics Prize

Mehadrin Is Relative

I feel like as much as men grumble about having to build a sukkah, we do enjoy the part where we get to figure out

Zeh Kaparasi

Of all the things that could be running through your head when you’re waiting in line for kaparos on a busy Erev Yom Kippur, I

Songs to Remember

Rosh Hashanah is once again upon us. If only there were some warning. And even though we mostly think about the seriousness of the day,

Fuel for Thought

With the price of gas being what it is these days, I sometimes think it might be a good idea to get a motorcycle. You

Beer With Me

There are basically two kinds of questions on a driving permit test. There’s “Yeah, that one’s obvious,” and there’s “How am I supposed to remember

Parenting Chickens

Ever since our kids came home with chickens, everyone we tell wants to know if they’re boys or girls. Like it really matters. I’ll tell