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September 17, 2024
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Linking Northern and Central NJ, Bronx, Manhattan, Westchester and CT

Mordechai Schmutter

Mordechai Schmutter is a freelance writer and a humor columnist for Hamodia and other magazines. He has also published seven books and does stand-up comedy. You can contact him at [email protected].

Articles by Mordechai Schmutter

Just Visiting

Yom Kippur is a good time to work on our mitzvot, such as the mitzvah of bikur cholim. Especially since no one you know is

Like Fish

My kids have three goldfish, which is way more goldfish than my wife originally wanted. And we don’t keep them in the same bowl. We

Remedial Exercise Class

Last night I went to my first exercise class ever. Now I know a lot of people might be wondering why I spend money on

Kitten Around

We apparently own a cat, or possibly five. I don’t know. How do you take legal ownership of a cat? I ask because I don’t

Homework Wars

My son has 30 questions for math homework. He says he did 12 of them in school. That means he has… um… some more to

Chimp Rights

Should chimpanzees be considered human? Before you say, “Of course not!” bear in mind that technically, chimps share 98.7 percent of their DNA with humans,

Air Out the Car

The following is a list of thoughts that went through my head on the way to and from my brother’s wedding. He had the chutzpah

Pain Management

Today’s topic: How to live with a herniated disc. A herniated disc is a common but extremely painful back injury, which is sometimes also called

A Little Too Emojional

I’m not generally big on texting. I basically just text my wife across the house when I don’t want to yell the same thing up

Pedestrian Tactics

We really need to think about safety tactics for pedestrians. That word has always bothered me. Pedestrian. I always thought pedestrian was too fancy a

Bear With Me

A lot of us don’t spend enough time thinking about bear safety, because we have jobs. We take steps to protect ourselves from insects, but

Back to Bed

I was in bed for most of this week, which isn’t as awesome as it sounds. I blame my back. I’ve had back problems on