April 10, 2025

Linking Northern and Central NJ, Bronx, Manhattan, Westchester and CT

Mordechai Schmutter

Mordechai Schmutter is a freelance writer and a humor columnist for Hamodia and other magazines. He has also published seven books and does stand-up comedy. You can contact him at MSchmutter@gmail.com.

Articles by Mordechai Schmutter

How to Kill a Goldfish

If you’re reading this, our goldfish is probably dead. Wait. You didn’t actually know we had a goldfish. I’ll start over. So we got a

Living Like Animals

Ever since I first ran a column that suggested that my wife and I are looking for a bigger house, people have been asking me

Everyone’s on My Back

I turned 35, which is not that big a deal. Well, it is to me, because my back hurts. And I’m at an age where,

Send Them Packing

The following is a packing list for things your kids need in camp. It’s possible the camp already sent you a packing list, but there’s

Be Cool

I’m thinking about moving into my fridge. It’s cooler in there, and I would also be closer to the food. My kids would come in

What Kind of Joke?

(The following is an excerpt of my newest book, What Is This—Some Kind of Joke? which is finally on sale wherever books are sold. Jewish

‘Shtill Shtending’

I’ve never really been a shtender person. I’ve never really had a problem holding my own siddur. It reminds me that I’m davening. Sure, I

Some Kind of Joke

I’m going to be honest with you here, because we’ve known each other a long time. Well, actually, I don’t know you. You know me,

Fairs of the State

One of the great joys of being a parent that they don’t tell you before they send you home from the hospital is that occasionally

Is This Your Car?

Is This Your Car? You know… you’d think that if you spent 20 minutes looking for a parking spot, you’d remember where it was. But

People to Lean On

In this week’s article, we’re going to have the big discussion that every couple has at some point—whether you should make your own Pesach seder

Open Compliments

Ever since I wrote that article a few months ago about how we’re looking for a new house, people keep asking us how the house