April 18, 2024
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Tempted Again by The Apple, 5,775 Years Later

“You are the difference between the world as it was, and the better place it will become.”

God’s words to Moses? The new UJA Federation slogan? A father’s blessing to his son?

Nope. How about the latest words of inspiration coming from Apple, as part of their new iPhone 6 launch?

To Apple iSay, “Hogwash.”

Back in the day, iWas a big fan of Steve Jobs, founder of everything Apple. iParticularly appreciated an aspect of his brilliance which the Wall Street Journal lauded, in an editorial shortly after he stepped down as CEO due to medical reasons. “The real sources of prosperity are breakthroughs that create products or services for which there is no current demand. Americans didn’t know they needed, much less wanted, an iPod until Apple invented it. Many people said there was no need for a digital tablet, since most Americans already had a cellphone or Blackberry and PC. Mr. Jobs thought that if he built it, people would come. He was right.”

Just like the guy in Field of Dreams.

Except Ray Kinsella created the Field of Dreams out of purely charitable and honorable convictions–that we all need a place in the world to dream, to reconnect with our fathers and have a catch in a cornfield on a summer day in Iowa, and oh, by the way, Ty Cobb–please join us.

It is clear to me by now that there was nothing magnanimous at all in the founding of Apple, much like there was nothing magnanimous at all in the other infamous Apple escapade which we are about to read in our weekly Torah portion. Adam and Eve bought the snake’s sales pitch hook line and sinker. And we have bought Jobs.

Tempted by the Apple again, 5,775 years later. “You are the difference between the world as it was, and the better place it will become.” Really? No. The slogan would be best stated as such: “You are the difference between our personal net worth sitting at $1 billion, and the better number it can become at $5 billion.”

The Apple of 2014 has created a world of endless selfish indulgence, not to mention the insufferable woman who clearly bit the Apple and drank the Kool Aid, a woman named Siri. Enough of her. The Apple of 2014 led to the need to create selfies, to post on Instagram, to like on Facebook, to tweet to the world. Chad Gadya. Chad Gadya.

May we point out that Facebook has ruined marriages, tweets have destroyed reputations, and selfies have revealed the worst that humanity has to offer. not to mention some downright hideous photos. Do iCare how many likes and dislikes this column will get? Not a chance. In fact, if my Mom, wife and kids are proud of me, then that’s really all that matters.

On a macro level, on a plain so heavy and large and dastardly, Apple’s success has led to the virtual creation of an Islamic Calpihate known as ISIS that can wreak world havoc through social media worse than any James Bond villain could ever concoct. Spielberg must be watching the organized social media campaign and the multitude of those assisting in ISIS terrorizing the Middle East and soon maybe even America, and he himself must be shell-shocked.

Hi-tech was once and still is useful and a joy. The internet, when used for knowledge, and laughs, and friends staying in touch, is certainly a blessing. Having moved beyond the modem, we have morphed into a society of self-aggrandizement, of immediate self-gratification, of addiction to a hand-held machine, and at worst, a society that can be laid to waste in a nano-second by an Islamic Caliphate hell-bent on destroying the world.

iImagine that anyone under the age of 25 reading this must think iNeed my head examined. Sorry to disappoint. We didn’t need the snake and the Apple back in the Garden of Eden, and iBelieve we need to scale back our dependence on the snakes of this Apple, as quickly as possible, if at all possible. iMuch rather be the independent thinker along the lines of the famous French philosopher and mathematician Ren? Descartes, also known as the Father of Modern Philosophy.

Descartes uttered classic words to live by. I am shocked Apple didn’t claim this one for themselves:

“iThink, therefore iAm.”

The rest of the Apple iPhone 6 launch in California, in front of a sold-out audience, included the following feel good mantra: “Relentless optimism is what moves the world forward. So keep seeing things differently. Keep trusting there is always another way, a better way, a bigger way. One that lifts up humanity, breaks down our barriers. And heals the landscape.”

iThink not. Rather, iThink it’s one of the world’s most clever money grabs. The cash spews out of our wallets like water from a fountain, for Phones, Chargers, Pods, Pads, Tablets, Cords, Shells, Cases, Tunes, Speakers, Headphones, Clouds, and now Watches, all of which begin with a small i.

And just today, iReceived this Rosh Hashana greeting via email:

Oy. iGive up.

By Robert Katz

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