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November 11, 2024
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Linking Northern and Central NJ, Bronx, Manhattan, Westchester and CT

With Pesach so recently in the rear view mirror, the memories created are still at the top of my mind. As a head of school, father and uncle, a highlight of the holiday for me was the time my family spent sitting around a table or on the floor playing a variety of board or card games. Perhaps those moments seem unremarkable to you. You may even fault me for not highlighting the Pesach seder, the time spent davening or the special foods.

Yet, the time during Pesach spent playing games stands out because those moments—i.e., unstructured time—seem harder to come by these days. It has become more and more rare to have a time to disconnect from devices, structures and routines, and connect with others in a fun, creative and relaxed way.

In his book How to be a High School Superstar, noted author Cal Newport argues that students should create blocks of unstructured time in their weekly schedule to allow for exploration and creativity. The “under scheduled” student thinks about how to use time efficiently and develop focused study habits in an intentional and systematic way, thus freeing up time to nurture talents and interests. These students stand out from their peers as interesting and accomplished, while also being what he calls the “relaxed superstar.”

Whether school-age students or career-driven adults, we can all benefit from unstructured time to use towards endeavors that nurture our interests. So many children and adults live in a structured world going from one calendar appointment or class to another, with hardly a moment to breathe in between.

In the first verse of Sefer Vayikra, God calls to Moshe ויקרא אל משה וידבר ה אליו. Rashi comments that God spoke to Moshe but also gave him time to process and ponder in between each section and topic לִתֵּן רֶוַח לְמֹשֶׁה לְהִתְבּוֹנֵן בֵּין פָּרָשָׁה לְפָרָשָׁה וּבֵין עִנְיָן לְעִנְיָן. Even Moshe Rabbeinu, who took in God’s teachings for 40 days and 40 nights without food or drink, needed breathing room between his classes to let his mind be freed to think openly.

Many of us get nervous when confronted with unstructured moments. Being overscheduled offers comfort and security. We can run from one thing to the next and finish our day or week feeling accomplished because we did what we set out to do. We are so accustomed to a packed schedule that we seek to plug any “open” moments with time fillers rather than embrace the mental quiet and pause.

One time filler, of course, is the ubiquitous smart device. Filling time with device-use is not analogous to unstructured time. There is growing concern that our extra moments are becoming consumed by our computers, smartphones or tablets. We live in a digital age in which we are all attached to these devices in one fashion or another. The concern is especially pointed for the younger generation, who are growing up surrounded by smart devices.

Jonathan Haidt, in his book The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness, argues that access to smartphones and social media from a young age has contributed to a mental health crisis in teens. He, too, advocates for creating unstructured time for young people to explore and interact in environments that are free from devices.

The Jewish Parents Forum of the Tikvah Fund recently held a Jewish Schools & Technology Summit for schools nationwide to share this research and different approaches that parents and educators are taking to create new, healthier norms around the use of technology. Aside from the detrimental effects from the use of social media and other content, being tethered to devices robs us all of the ability to have the unstructured time we need to nurture talent and creativity and connect with others.

Much wisdom and research has been shared by colleagues at the Summit and in subsequent articles in The Jewish Link, and many initiatives are underway at schools to create initiatives to regain control of the unstructured time we all need and cherish. We are already blessed with the beauty of Shabbos and the oasis of time it affords us away from the distractions of technology and overscheduled school and work weeks.

I will just add my plug for the timeless endeavors that I believe will always have a healthy place in human development and growth:

Read a book! Notwithstanding how much is available digitally, I believe that there will always be a place in this world for books and print. בתי מדרש and libraries are not a thing of the past; they are the refuge of the past, present and future.

Play a game! Even though I’m not such a “game” person myself, the act of engaging can be so fulfilling.

Get outdoors! Research and personal experience show that spending time outside and staying active boosts energy and mood. I personally enjoy taking work calls or meetings while walking and am spotted regularly on the paths and streets around my school.

Part of the beauty of Pesach and all our chagim is the opportunity to reset and reconnect with ourselves and others. As we look ahead to the warmer weather and summer breaks, it is the perfect chance to evaluate how we can build in open time, broadening and nourishing our souls, away from the distractions and our over-routinized lives.


Rabbi Dani Rockoff is the head of school at Westchester Day School.

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